Chick #1: So, I was talkin’ to Gary yesterday.
Chick #2: He is so far up his own ass, I’m surprised he can say anything.
Chick #1: Yeah, I know. He was talking about some audio clip he’s doing, and how great it is, and my god — he annoys the shit out of me!
Chick #2: Yeah… Fantastic fuck, though.
Chick #1: Agreed — he is huge… I kind of heart Gary.
Central Station
Sydney
Australia
Hot lady to another: Well, that’s one drawback to being a whore.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: loyal seattle reader
Sleazy white employee: Yeah, man, black girls know how to work it.
Black employee: Uh-huh.
Sleazy white employee, whispering: Yo, man, I was doin’ one one time, though, and I was about to go on her chest and she was like, ‘Nuh-uh,’ and pointed it at me and it went on my chest!
EB Games
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: works downstairs
Fourth grade student: All the guys in France have big schlongs.
Virginia
Marine: So, things were going really well until he blew the tranny.
Twentynine Palms, California
Guy: I’ve heard rumors…
Girl: About me?
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: Me and Tina both got knocked up by you.
Guy: What?
Girl: And it’s not a rumor — it’s the truth.
Guy: How drunk was I?
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: overheardinmillersville
Dude #1: So he says, ‘If you can walk a straight line, you can come into my bar.’
Dude #2: And then he got raped!
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: ummmm
Latina: … And so she taught her nephews how to put condoms on by having them practice putting them on her vibrator!
Boy toy: What the fuck? How old are they?
Latina: Eleven.
UCLA, Charles E. Young Drive
Los Angeles, California
Chick #1: Have you ever had a class with him?
Chick #2: Yeah.
Chick #1: Does he really cry in class?
Chick #2: Sometimes.
Chick #1: … Cool.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/04/most_teachers_wait_until_they.html
Overheard by: wishing he was my prof
Teen girl: I just discovered my fly was undone when my hand was mysteriously near my crotch.
Subway restaurant
New Zealand
