Massachusetts

Emo high school girl to friend: He's kind of like the replacement parent for kids with delinquent parents…only he has sex with you and 10 of your friends.

Newbury Street
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: CK

Hot chick to guy: Dude, I know. You're such a good friend. You put up with my shit, and I'm not even blowing you!

Boston, Massachusetts

Little boy (loudly): I want to eat poop.
Mom (who clearly wasn't paying attention): What, honey?
Little boy: I would like to eat poop.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: JessH.

Professor, to VCR: Oh, you socialist!

Tantasqua High School
Fiskdale, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Kat

Hipster: So my girlfriend was sketching me naked when I went home. So I was sitting there, you know… naked. And then her parents walked in.

Boston, Massachusetts

Psych professor: Yeah… Snickers bars… top of the list. Best things you can put in your mouth without asking permission.

Harvard Psychology Lecture
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: I prefer Kit-Kats

Guy: Remember “sweaty boobs”?
Girl: What?
Guy: Remember he broke up with her because she had sweaty boobs!

Porter Exchange
Somerville, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Dave

Drunk girl #1: You get to hook up with all the guys walking around clapping to the music.
Drunk girl #2: That's fine! I like the clap!

Beverly, Massachusetts

Overheard by: sam-a-lamb

Half-drunk tourist girl: You’re lying! Nobody has all that happen in their life!
Half-drunk guy with NY accent: I’m from Brooklyn! We all live unbelievable lives!

Parker House Bar
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: annikee

Loud guy on street corner: And over there is where I saw my first hooker!

Tremont and Boylston
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: I heard him from -inside- a car