Students

Chick, responding to example question: You can’t randomly choose which woman gets an abortion and which doesn’t!
Professor: Why not?
Chick: Because some women do want to give up their babies!
Professor: I don’t care! I’m a statistician!

Statistics class, Ohio State University
Columbus, Ohio

Overheard by: Rachel

Girl #1: The school paper couldn’t use that picture.
Girl #2: Why not?
Girl #1: They said there were too many people in it.
Girl #2: We were in China!

Rider University
Lawrenceville, New Jersey

Freshman girl to gaggle: Why is my mom such a whore?! Nuns are sluts.

Rochester Institute of Technology
Rochester, New York

Health teacher: The four types of sexual activity we’re going to cover are vaginal intercourse, anal sex, oral sex, and mutual masturbation.
Eighth grader: Oral sex? Isn’t that, like, over the phone?

Pyle Middle School
Bethesda, Maryland

Overheard by: Next year the teacher preempted the question in her lecture

Crazy college student: Can you take the rubber ducky? I can’t bring him into the cafeteria. There’s no duck food in there.

Blanton Hall, Montclair State University
New Jersey

Overheard by: Rubber Ducks don’t eat

Professor: Ben, what did you get for that one?
Student: First, I’m Matt. Second, I don’t know.
Professor: Well, it’s okay to be mad.
Student: No, I’m not mad, I’m Matt. M-A-T-T, Matt.

Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York

Overheard by: Kelly

Student #1 seeing friend drinking Monster energy drink: Oh, I’ve never had a Monster. Can I have a taste?
Student #2: You don’t want to taste his AIDS-infested Monster!
Student #1, after long pause: Never. Say that. Again. Ever.

Doughnut shop
Huntington Beach, California

Dude: So, what’s your major?
Chick: English.
Dude: Really? Wow, you’re really fuckable for an English major.
Chick: Uh, thanks…

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/05/huge-update.html

Overheard by: lola

Oxford boy #1: I’m going to stab you in the heart.
Oxford boy #2: Last night you stayed at my house and now you want to stab me in the heart?!

London-bound train
United Kingdom

Overheard by: snickering american sisters

Fourth grade student: All the guys in France have big schlongs.

Virginia