Colorado

Girl: I hate faux-hawks. I can’t believe they’re coming back in style. They’re the worst hairstyle ever.
Mother: I think mullets are the worst hairstyle ever.
Girl: At least mullets are honest!

Boulder, Colorado

Overheard by: J

Chick #1: But you know, a lot of the things written in the Bible did come true.
Chick #2: Oh, that’s a bullshit argument: I can say that Nosferatu’s prophecies also came true!

The Laughing Goat
Boulder, Colorado

Overheard by: the french Draculla

Nerd: … And those are just a few of the reasons I’ve been thinking about taking up the harmonica again.

University of Colorado-Boulder
Colorado

Overheard by: amused prof

Son: I just don’t understand it.
Father: That’s because you have no imagination.

Foothills Mall
Fort Collins, Colorado

Overheard by: Tempus

Chick #1 exiting bathroom stall: I can’t believe I’m getting my gun tomorrow.
Chick #2: Yeah… Too bad they can’t put color in it. It’s going to be pretty ugly.
Chick #1: It’s a gun.
Chick #2: Doesn’t mean it has to be ugly.
Chick #1: Yeah, it would be cool in purple.

Grand Junction, Colorado

30-ish lady: What grade are you in?
Little girl: Third grade. I can do math problems.
30-ish lady: Okay, well, if you have three dogs, two cats and four fish, how many animals do you have, total?
Little girl: … Ummm, nine.
30-ish lady: Well, yeah, sort of… If you count fish as animals, but really they’re amphibians.

Movie theater
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: ak

Lady: Wait, are you telling me that K.D. Lang is a lesbian?! How do you know?!

K.D. Lang/Lyle Lovett concert, Red Rocks Amphitheater
Colorado

Girlfriend: Oooh! Baby, we should get a dozen donuts!
Boyfriend: Okay. Do you wanna pick six, and I’ll pick six? [Girlfriend gives icy stare.] Fine, you pick all twelve. I don’t care.
Girlfriend: Twelve? I said I want a dozen.
Boyfriend: Um, honey, twelve is a dozen.
Girlfriend: I know what a dozen is, and it’s not fucking twelve! I’m not fucking stupid, you know!
Boyfriend: You’re, like 25 years old! How can you not know what a dozen is?
Girlfriend: I know what a fucking dozen is! [Looks around] What the fuck are all of you laughing at?!

King Soopers Dairy
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: We were right to point and laugh

Extremely drunk man: You know, I don’t think prime numbers are going to introduce us to aliens… But I think Chuck Berry will.

The Old Hole
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: E

Freshman chick #1: It’s like, I came home and, like, three months had passed for me, but, like, not for everyone else.
Freshman chick #2: Yeah, my bed is too short now.

Denver International Airport
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: lith