Giggling coed looking at something in friend’s purse: Think you have enough of those?
Friend: I know it looks bad, but I’m terribly allergic to male sperm.
Durango, Colorado
Guy: You know what we should do this weekend? Roofie each other to see what it feels like!
Colorado State University
Colorado
Man looking at anteaters and monkeys in pen: Wow! I didn’t know anteaters were a type of monkey!
Primate House, Denver Zoo
Denver, Colorado
Chick, to teacher: Do you remember the Geto Boys, with the black dwarf who now raps for Jesus and got shot in the face by his girlfriend so now his eye is all slack?
Rest of class: … What?
High school classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Guy on cell: Well, last night I had food poisoning, and today I had beans, so this could get interesting.
Denver Airport
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Glad I didn’t sit near him
Male fencer: So, how’s that new job at the preschool?
Female fencer: Pretty good. One of the boys in the class is named after a Viet Cong assassin.
Metro State College of Denver
Colorado
Little girl: Do you have any cinnamon rolls?
Cashier: No.
Little girl: Are you serious?
Cashier: I am serious. I would never joke about something like this.
Starbucks
Denver, Colorado
Dude: I have lots of friends in anarchist groups.
Chick: Doesn’t an organized group of anarchists kind of defeat the purpose?
Dude: … You’re gay!
High school classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Woman modeling outfit from fitting room: What do you think?
Husband: That outfit makes you look like Garry Shandling!
Ann Taylor, Cherry Creek Mall
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: lauren
Shabby guy to friend: … So now I have to go appease all of these pregnant people…
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Kirsten
