Chick, to teacher: Do you remember the Geto Boys, with the black dwarf who now raps for Jesus and got shot in the face by his girlfriend so now his eye is all slack?
Rest of class: … What?
High school classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Chick, to teacher: Do you remember the Geto Boys, with the black dwarf who now raps for Jesus and got shot in the face by his girlfriend so now his eye is all slack?
Rest of class: … What?
High school classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Guy on cell: Well, last night I had food poisoning, and today I had beans, so this could get interesting.
Denver Airport
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Glad I didn’t sit near him
Male fencer: So, how’s that new job at the preschool?
Female fencer: Pretty good. One of the boys in the class is named after a Viet Cong assassin.
Metro State College of Denver
Colorado
Little girl: Do you have any cinnamon rolls?
Cashier: No.
Little girl: Are you serious?
Cashier: I am serious. I would never joke about something like this.
Starbucks
Denver, Colorado
Dude: I have lots of friends in anarchist groups.
Chick: Doesn’t an organized group of anarchists kind of defeat the purpose?
Dude: … You’re gay!
High school classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Woman modeling outfit from fitting room: What do you think?
Husband: That outfit makes you look like Garry Shandling!
Ann Taylor, Cherry Creek Mall
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: lauren
Shabby guy to friend: … So now I have to go appease all of these pregnant people…
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Kirsten
Girl: I hate faux-hawks. I can’t believe they’re coming back in style. They’re the worst hairstyle ever.
Mother: I think mullets are the worst hairstyle ever.
Girl: At least mullets are honest!
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: J
Chick #1: But you know, a lot of the things written in the Bible did come true.
Chick #2: Oh, that’s a bullshit argument: I can say that Nosferatu’s prophecies also came true!
The Laughing Goat
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: the french Draculla
Nerd: … And those are just a few of the reasons I’ve been thinking about taking up the harmonica again.
University of Colorado-Boulder
Colorado
Overheard by: amused prof
