Ranting idiot: I mean, what the fuck? We live in the United States. It is 2006. There is no excuse for having fucking rotten teeth. I don’t care if she is your sister — brush your fucking teeth!
Town Hall Café
Empire, Colorado
Overheard by: try 2007 – TK
Goth girl wearing blue beehive wig: So Morgan Freeman, a college professor, and a hot guy walk into a ska club.
Friend: And?
Goth girl: Oh, there's no punchline, that actually happened.
Denver, Colorado
Chick #1: Mike Dunleavy went to a Catholic school, and Troy Murphy went to a Jesuit school.
Chick #2: They're star-crossed lovers! One is a Catholic, the other a Jesuit!
Pepsi Center
Denver, Colorado
Museum employee: I'm from Minnesota, originally.
Guy: I lived in Minnesota for a while, a long time back. Nice place, but there was way too much of that one guy. You know, that guy? The little guy? With “purple …”?
Museum employee: …Prince?
Guy: Yeah, that's the one.
Art Museum
Denver, Colorado
Security guard to woman who just drove over the curb: Are you drunk?
Woman driver: No, she (points to passenger) was distracting me with my vibrator!
Hospital Parking Lot
Denver, Colorado
Girl #1: Why does Denzel Washington with a gun freak me out?
Girl #2: Because he’s black.
Movie Theater
Colorado
Guy, singing: He'll only be your friend if he touches your breast…
Girl: What?!
Guy, not singing anymore: It's like my favorite song.
Metro State
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Squid
Girl to friends: I mean, think about it: a girl that's pretty now could be ugly in ten years.
Crested Butte, Colorado
Overheard by: Wow.
Chick giving presentation: Because this is Russia, bitch.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
