Chick #1, fawning over little pup: Oh my god, he is sooo adorable. Hellooo! Hellooo there, little guy! Awww, so cute. [She and her friend walk away.]Chick #2: Oh, he was so cute! I wish I could have one.
Chick #1: I wish I could have stepped on the little thing and squished its little head.
http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2007/03/29/are-we-talking-about-girl-1-or-the-dog/
Stoner teen girl watching seals: If I ever turn into an animal, I hope I’m not a seal.
Friend: Why?
Stoner teen girl: ‘Cause just look at the poor things — it’s so hard for them to, like, move. They just wobble everywhere. No legs to help them. I feel so bad for them.
Camden Aquarium
Camden, New Jersey
Overheard by: maryjane
Man with Mohawk on cell: Okay, so I’m not technically the father but there are 27 baby boa constrictors over here that all have Mohawks.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: cgt
Recent college grad: Wait, you mean elephants are mammals?!
York, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: not a mammal either
Comic book artist: Is the word “stab” or “poink” best for a dog nose being inserted into someone’s butt?
Group of coworkers in unison, very serious: “Poink,” definitely.
Portland, Oregon
Girl pointing at caterpillar on floor: Oh my god! What is that?
Friend: Ew, it’s a caterpillar!
Girl: It just crawled out of me!
Friend: What?
Girl: Well she was just telling me that there are fish that crawl up your va‐j‑j if you pee in the lake!
Friend: That’s only for guys. And in the Amazon!
Redding, California
Woman #1: I fell down the stairs yesterday.
Woman #2: Oh my god! Me, too! What happened?
Woman #1: I don’t know. I just fell.
Woman #2: I guess I’m a little better than you — a possum was chasing me.
Target
Virginia
Teacher: So, you have two teams. Let’s make a team name. Like…the red team and the green team, or the lion team and the tiger team. What’s your team name?
Ten‐year‐old boy: Obama team. (team members nod)
Teacher: Uh, okay. (to other team) So, are you guys the McCain team?
Ten‐year‐old girl: No! (whispered consultation with team members) Blue team.
English School
Gifu
Japan
Guy on cell: Now turn it on and set it to cow mode… Right, but be sure it’s in cow mode… No, you’ll know when it’s in cow mode.
Kroger Grocery
Conway, Arkansas
Overheard by: Not sure I want to know
