Chicks

Chick #1: The problem with buying a house seized by the police? Someone could have been murdered there.
Chick #2: That’s not a problem, that’s a bonus!

Aurora, Colorado

Tall chick: I wish I could find a nice, tall guy.
Friend #1: My brother is 6’5″.
Tall chick: Is he cute?
Friend: Well…
Friend #2: He looks like a Mexican pedophile.
Tall chick: 6’5″, eh? I’ll think about it.

High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado

Skanky girl walking down hall to friends: She told me to put my cigarette out… I put it in my bra.

Asher Alternative High School
Detroit, Michigan

Hipster college dude: You mean you had anal?
Hipster college chick: Well, more like mental anal.
Hipster college dude: Mental anal. Hmmm, let me think on that a spell.

UNM Campus
Albuquerque, New Mexico

Overheard by: klutch

[Chick #1 drops purse, condom falls out.]Chick #2: [Hands it back.] I didn’t know you had a penis.
Chick #1: I’m just being prepared.
Chick #2: In case you grow a penis?

High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado

Bouncer: I don’t know… Do you have another piece of ID on you?
Blonde: No, but go ahead, ask me anything!
Bouncer: Why don’t your shoes match your skirt?

London, Ontario
Canadia

Middle school chick: Sir, are you married?
Substitute teacher: That’s a very personal question. That’s like if I asked you, “Has it started yet?”

Terman Middle School
Palo Alto, California

Overheard by: heerothewizard

Chick #1: I miss my car.
Chick #2: I miss my car too. Not like, driving it or anything. But I miss my car. We’ve been through so much together –four accidents, hitting a mailbox, and a lot of repairs. But I’m not like, a bad driver or anything.

George Washington University
Washington, DC

20-something in pink heels, on a Saturday afternoon: God, I’m like frickin walk of shame Barbie right now.

eavesdropdc.blogspot.com

High school chick #1: Omygod, I totally love him.
High school chick #2: Omygod, me too.
High school chick #1: I mean, he is like easily the hottest guy at our school.
High school chick #2: Oh totally. Like he is soooo cute.
[pause].
High school chick #2: What does he look like again?
High school chick #1: Um, like, I think he wears jeans a lot.

Lambton Quay
Wellington
New Zealand