Guy with sunglasses on cell: So I went back to the apartment today and he was passed out again! (pause) Yeah, dude, I think he smoked a bowl on my bed and then seized a few times…
B Train
Boston, Massachusetts
Guy with sunglasses on cell: So I went back to the apartment today and he was passed out again! (pause) Yeah, dude, I think he smoked a bowl on my bed and then seized a few times…
B Train
Boston, Massachusetts
Black teen employee to teen girl employee: Some of these people, they want to get to know you and make a connection, and I'm like, “man, I don't want to be your friend, I just want to give you a towel.”
Marino Center
Boston, Massachusetts
Tall gay 20-something male on cell: My niece died. I need a Fresca.
CVS
Boston, Massachusetts
Bro: Yeah, I remember the first time I saw someone projectile-vomit.
Northeastern University
Boston, Massachusetts
Old man: I recently had surgery. What was it I had removed? Something that starts with a ‘P’…
Old lady: Was it your pancreas?
Old man: No… It wasn’t my penis, either, because I definitely still have that.
L.L. Bean Outlet
Wareham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Amanda
Five-year-old boy, loudly interrupting adults: I have a wedgie!
(adults laugh)
Five-year-old boy: This wedgie train is carrying wedgies!
Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Male professor, in a very girly voice: Aaaahhh! I'm being trampled by sea horses.
UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Teen girl #1: Isn’t that, like, dangerous?
Teen girl #2: Well, yeah, but I’m at the point in my life where getting wasted is more important than not dying.
Newbury Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Cab driver, ending phone call: That's why you never marry a chick that'll swallow for an extra $20. Can't believe people like that are on Craigslist!
Boston, Massachusetts
Professor: I just think of this class as 40 days in a row and then it’s over. Like the Jews in Egypt.
Student: It was 40 years.
Professor: 40 years, 40 days. Same difference.
Northeastern University
Boston, Massachusetts
