High school physics teacher: You see, everything has a gravitational force, so everything is attracted to everything else. For example, I am attracted to this door. This… is a really… nice door. And this table — this is a really, really nice table… But I really like the door.
Massachusetts
Geek: I can’t wait to spend three days sitting in my underwear working on my websites.
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Overheard by:
Jovial woman on cell: So, when the Alzheimer’s sets in, this’ll all work out for you in the end!
Grocery store
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Eggson
Old lady on cell in crowded train: Yes, I’m here in a sardine tin, but everyone is really nice…
Tel-Aviv
Israel
Overheard by: claustrophobic
Girl: I love this new toothpaste I got. It has green tea in it and tastes absolutely fantastic. It feels like there’s a tea party going on in my mouth, and I just want to invite my teddy bears or something!
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: Ali and Livi
Little girl when dad hands her balloon: I’ve been waiting all my life for this…
Chik-Fil-A
Newport News, Virginia
Overheard by: Audrey
Old lady diner to captain: This food is amazing. I hope the chef is single, over 60, and horny.
Arnaud’s Restaurant, Bienville Street
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: The Frontwaiter
College freshman: I keep making plans for my funeral, and they keep getting better!
San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Anne
Little old lady: I’m not a Pina Colada type. Give me a Coors Light and a nice doobie and I’m good.
Women’s Gym
Studio City, California
Overheard by: urzzz
Six-year-old girl: Mum, remember when we went on that airplane?
Distracted mum: Mm-hmm?
Six-year-old girl: Was that paradise?
Train
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Wishing I could go holiday there
