Physics kid #1: I’m going to stab you in the jugular!
Physics kid #2: I once got hit in the jugular with a ping-pong ball…
Physics kid #1: My friend got hit by a car recently when he was running at night.
Physics kid #2: Wait, in the jugular?
overheardmost
Overheard by: http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/04/long-time-no-update.html
Northeastern University girl: I’m so nervous about that Economics test…
Northeastern University guy: Oh, that? That class is so easy. You just have to go to class.
Northeastern University girl: See, if I go to class, I get confused and don’t get it, so I don’t bother going anymore.
39 bus
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: let me clue you in
Student #1: I gotta take Psychology next semester.
Student #2: Fuck no — too much reading.
Student #1: Sucks, man.
Student #2: Yeah, who cares if we all want to fuck our dads?
Student #1: Not me.
Student #2: Me either.
Men’s room, College
Farmington, Connecticut
Overheard by: hoppersitter
Professor: The Civil War actually brought along a lot of the standardized clothing measurements that we use today, though they were much more in-depth, such as inseam in relation to knuckle-width and things like that… And, of course, they measured penis size.
Student: Why?
Professor: Well, because it’s one of the things you can measure.
http://www.overheardatumbc.com
Girl: Yeah, there’s a Facebook group called ‘I’m a fermata, hold me.’
Professor: What?
Girl: You know, Facebook? YouTube?
Professor: What?!
Girl: You know, like, the Internet?
Professor: I know about the Internet! I know!
Sarah Lawrence College
New York
Guy: … But in a collision between a goat and a castle, who would win?
Chick: I think the goat would. It’s quite a big goat.
Lecturer: Remember — it’s allegorical.
History seminar, British university
UK
MBA: The name of the class is ‘Financial Statement Anal.’ Looks like it’ll be tough.
http://overheardatkmc.blogspot.com/
Overheard by:
Student to another: Well, maybe the urinal wanted to be dried. Did you ever think about that?
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Trying to Teach Here
[Teacher rises from desk and moves to white board while carrying sheet of paper.]
Student: What are you doing? [Teacher begins writing on white board.] What are you doing?!
Teacher: I’m writing down your homework!
Student: Oh, I thought you were going to hurt us.
Teacher: I’m just holding a piece of paper!
Arcadia, California
Overheard by: Giggling student
