Mom: This is ridiculous! Why are you crying?
Wailing four-year-old: Because I have no reason left to live!
701 Russell Avenue
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Mom: This is ridiculous! Why are you crying?
Wailing four-year-old: Because I have no reason left to live!
701 Russell Avenue
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Guy: So, my Friday night was a little awkward.
Girl: How so?
Guy: Well, uh… I sort of… um… Made out with Lyndsey.
Girl: Lyndsey. As in, my ex-boyfriend’s little sister, Lyndsey?! I can’t believe this! What the hell is wrong with you?
Guy: Don’t hate me. It wouldn’t have happened if you were there to watch me! I blame you. Die.
Woodinville, Washington
Dad, screaming at four kids: Get back here, you little bastards! If you don’t behave, I’ll make you sleep in the hotel bathroom when we get there! [10-year-old drops his ticket, and it starts blowing away.] Jimmy! What the hell?! How could you do something so fucking stupid?! Well, what are you standing there for? Run and get it!
Mom, screaming at dad: Why don’t you relax?! He dropped his ticket — so what, you son of a bitch?! We’ll make it there and then you will relax! Your stress issues are really driving me crazy!
Lady behind them in line, to her own husband: I love you, honey.
Airport
Virginia
Chick #1: Look, I’m wearing orange!
Chick #2: Fuck you! You just did that to piss me off, didn’t you?!
Chick #1: Yeah…
Downers Grove, Illinois
Crew member: Sir, you can’t stand here.
Old man, blocking walkway: [Ignores him.]Crew member: Sir! This is a walkway.
Old man: This is foolishness!
Passerby: Why don’t you just die, already?
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
Overheard by: uncomfortably waiting for the damn fireworks
Northeastern University girl: I’m so nervous about that Economics test…
Northeastern University guy: Oh, that? That class is so easy. You just have to go to class.
Northeastern University girl: See, if I go to class, I get confused and don’t get it, so I don’t bother going anymore.
39 bus
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: let me clue you in
Kid: Hey, where does the line start?
Mom: All the way over there.
Kid: Dear God. My glasses have fooled me yet again!
Kohl’s
Howell, New Jersey
Guy: You really need to stop driving by my house and calling me 20 times a day.
Ex-girlfriend: Whatever. You’re acting like I’m a crazy stalker or something… And I don’t drive by your house all the time.
Guy: Well, every time I or my dad or my roommate leave the house, you’re driving away. It’s kind of creepy.
Ex-girlfriend: Oh, what? Like, I mean, I would never shoot you!
Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Guy #1, at urinal: That bitch is out of control.
Guy #2, at urinal: Yeah, she’s all kinds of fucked up. She needs to chill.
Guy #1: She needs to fuckin’ simmer. Simmer and sauté.
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/04/let-it-go-bobby-flay-just-let-it-go.html
Overheard by: teamcinnamon
College chick: You cannot do a scientific study to see which city is the least gangster!
Rally’s
Charleston, West Virginia
Overheard by: gudo
