Biology professor: No, penises don’t just fall off. Guys, you have nothing to worry about.
University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Chicken
Biology professor: No, penises don’t just fall off. Guys, you have nothing to worry about.
University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Chicken
Crunchy hippie: We were on the way to the bee colony to harvest some honey, but then I thought, Dude! It’s time for a drum circle.
House of Musical Traditions
Takoma Park, Maryland
Customer #1: Can you tell me about these TVs? Oh, sorry, I thought you worked here. You are dressed just like them.
Customer #2: That's okay. I don't know much about TVs.
Customer #1: What's to know? You plug it in and connect the cable, right? You probably know as much as them. Now these TVs, if they are digital, which they say they are… do I need a cable box for these or do I just put the setting on cable?
Customer #2: I don't know. I don't have a digital TV.
Customer #1: I don't have a TV either. I'm homeless. I have a radio.
Best Buy
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Scomart
Queer: … And I was like, ‘Honey, it’s not like I have a subscription to Town and Country to look at the dresses!’
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: widget
Sophomore girl #1: Did you hear Matt and Derek are going out now?
Sophomore girl #2: No way! I totally gave Matt his first blow job. He can't be gay! (pauses) Oh my god! Do you think I turned him gay?
Passing junior guy: Yeah, that'd do it.
High School
Annapolis, Maryland
Little boy, standing next to a car: Daddy, this isn’t our car! Daddy, what are you doing? This isn’t our car!
Man: Look, buddy, you’ve got to stop saying that when we’re in parking lots. [to a couple walking by] I just got a new car.
Little boy: No you didn’t!
AMC Theatres
Owings Mills, Maryland
Overheard by: they steal cars, dont they?
Girl discussing Edgar Allan Poe's The Oval Portrait: It's just that it seems like he went through and for each word looked in the dictionary for the longest synonym. Or, well, did he use those words back then?
Baltimore School for the Arts
Baltimore, Maryland
Serious Asian dude: I don't like angry soul food bitches. I like happy soul food bitches.
Maryland
Overheard by: Neither nor
Ghetto woman, indignantly: And then he told my mama he wanted me to get tested ’cause he didn’t think the baby was his!
Ghetto man, outraged: Inconsiderate fuck! It was his, wasn’t it?
Ghetto woman: Hell no! I don’t know who I be sleeping with! [They laugh.] Bitch, please — I fuck like a squirrel!
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Tiki
Guy: Man, look at this guy! It's weird how they keep the eyelashes and hair on to keep them semi-human. You can see everything!
Girl: Um, are all penises so big?
Guy: I think it's due to preserving process.
Girl: I'm hungy.
Body Worlds Exhibit
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: 8lb Gem my ASS!!