Moms

20-something: Alright! Smells like booze on the plane.
Overprotective mom: No, that’s just my hand sanitizer.

Flight to Buffalo, New York

Mom to daughter: All I’m saying is, it would really help get rid of your fat and your pimples.

Mount Vernon
Alexandria, Virginia

Overheard by: mm2105

Mom: Do you remember what the name of this river is, Billy?
Son: Is it the Platonic River?

Washington, DC

Overheard by: Keith

Disgruntled mother: If I catch you biting your nails again, I am going to cut off your hair in your sleep.

Gloucester Road
London
England

Overheard by: Never want to have children

Mom with sunscreen in hand: Give me your arm so I can put this on you.
Little boy: Ewww! What is that?
Mom: Sunscreen. What did you think it was?
Little boy: Mayonnaise!

Giants Game, AT&T Park
San Francisco, California

Blond boy: Mommy, what do llamas eat?
Mother: Little blond boys.
Blond boy, knowingly: Ohhh…

Waterloo Park
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Kelsey

Five-year-old girl in stall: Mommy, there’s lots of writing in here…
Mother in adjacent stall: Uh-huh… Don’t read it…

Truck stop
Charleston, West Virginia

Distraught mom on cell: I’ll sum up my vacation in one sentence: Ian punched Goofy in the nuts!

Bus to the Magic Kingdom
California

Overheard by: disneymom

Mother: Derek, come back here!
Five-year-old: No! You can’t tell me what to do! I’m going to go gamble some more! [Runs off.]

CAT ferry from Nova Scotia to Portland, Maine

Overheard by: Misaki

Child: Look!
Mom: They’re just flamingos. They don’t do anything.

Disney World
Orlando, Florida

Overheard by: Suezahn