Frumpy middle aged woman: Excuse me, who can I talk to if I'm interested in purchasing a piece of furniture?
Employee: That would be me. How can I help you?
Frumpy middle aged woman: I'm interesting in purchasing a piece of furniture.
Furniture Store
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Angry college girl: It's either art or the cat!
Artsfest 2008
State College, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Kat
Guy #1, standing in front of classroom: So he walked up to me and was like, “Dude, do you want a donut?” and of course I was like, “yeah.”
Guy #2: Well, yeah. I love donuts too.
Guy #1: So then he whips out this trash bag and it's filled to the top with donuts. So I took this one off the top and started eating it, and then I realized, dude! Where the hell did you get a trash bag full of donuts?
Guy #2: Woah. Where'd he go?!
Hanover, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Emmeline
Man on street (asking for donations to a charity): You wanna donate?
Man #1: What about all the money I pay in taxes? That's a donation.
Man #2: Oh shit, I don't even know what to say to that.
16th & Chestnut
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: indigo
Girl #1: I'm so high.
Girl #2: Oh, I don't do that anymore, last time I was high I gave a two-hour blow job.
Girl #1: Oh my god, did a little piece of your soul die?
Girl #2 : Not really, Jesus Christ Superstar was on in the background.
Girl #1: Oh, well, musicals make everything better.
Girl #2: Definitely.
York, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Jess
Girl #1: She finally cleaned up the dog crap!
Girl #2: What? Her dog crapped in the house?
Girl #1: No, but it was all over the front yard. Can you imagine me trying to walk through that drunk?
Guy: I'm pretty sure that what happens when you're drunk is your responsibility. Getting trashed doesn't make stepping in dog shit someone else's fault.
Girl #1: Don't hate! Oh my god!
Millersville University
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Random guy: Dudes! I just wasted 30,000 feet of caution tape!
Sheetz
Pennsylvania
Brother: How come mom drives all the way to the mall to get you but I have to take the bus home?
Sister: I don't know, I guess she thinks it isn't safe.
Brother: Oh yeah, I forgot girls are helpless.
Sister: Uh, probably because I'm more likely to get raped and beaten!
Brother: Ooooh, look at miss popular.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Art history professor: Those long ship voyages… you're looking at the sheep, the sheep's looking back at you, and “hey!”
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Guy on phone: Does she move when you have sex with her? Maybe that's the problem.
University Park, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Bill
