Girl: Think about it — when a Sesame Street character gives a BJ, not only are you getting oral, but you’re getting a hand-job, too.
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: David James
Girl: Think about it — when a Sesame Street character gives a BJ, not only are you getting oral, but you’re getting a hand-job, too.
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: David James
Four-year-old boy: Dad, for dessert can I have sugar?
Cocoa’s Diner
Hershey, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Gette
Stoner: Yo, that chick was kind of hot. She was starin’ at me.
Hipster: She wasn’t hot, and she was staring at you because you were in her way.
Stoner: I like it my way better.
Millersville University
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Steveo
College boy, laughing: You mean to tell me you think the Beatles changed music forever?
Mom: Yes, of course.
College boy, still laughing: Come on, Mom — with those 45-percent-gay haircuts?
Art Institute of Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
Ghetto hoochie stoner: I can’t remember nothin’ ’bout nothin’. My long-term memory is ’bout to get shot.
Outside of City Hall
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: lora
Sleazy white employee: Yeah, man, black girls know how to work it.
Black employee: Uh-huh.
Sleazy white employee, whispering: Yo, man, I was doin’ one one time, though, and I was about to go on her chest and she was like, ‘Nuh-uh,’ and pointed it at me and it went on my chest!
EB Games
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: works downstairs
Guy: I’ve heard rumors…
Girl: About me?
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: Me and Tina both got knocked up by you.
Guy: What?
Girl: And it’s not a rumor — it’s the truth.
Guy: How drunk was I?
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: overheardinmillersville
Dude #1: Let’s go somewhere else.
Dude #2: Why?
Dude #1: I’ve seen the midget. I’ve drunk his juice.
Dude #2: Yeah…
Casey’s, South Side
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
College girl #1: Ew, why does it all run out?
College girl #2: Well, it is a liquid.
College girl #3: And your vag isn’t exactly full of Bounty paper towels!
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Girl, looking at books: I love the library! It's like natural Adderall.
Scranton, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: too old for this
