Overheard at Loyola

White boy: I’m just a freshman. I don’t know how to get bitches yet.


Overheard by:

Kid #1: Man, you always say that word when you’re drunk.
Kid #2: Yeah, I know. I need to stop watching that Michael Richards video.


Bimbette: I don’t know… I just feel something swimming around inside of me!


Guy: … So then this girl just starts biting the staples off of her butt!


Guy #1: Dude, she was holding my hand and making out with Michelle at the same time.
Guy #2: Nice.


Girl: This guy was really rude and annoying, so I decided to make out with him… I was really drunk and somehow that made sense.


Guy #1: Dude, I’m really embarrassed. Last night I peed in her roommate’s closet.
Guy #2: Hall of fame! That’s hall of fame material!


Guy #1: If you told her you like sublime you could probably toss it in.
Guy #2: Yeah, I'd let her slob the knob just to see the four finger, cartoon hand grab.


Overheard by: tlc

Girl #1: I don't know, I mean…he's not the best looking.
Girl #2: Yeah, but neither is she. I mean, she can be…
Girl #1: Yeah, I mean, he's not really good looking, and she's not pretty-pretty, y'know?
Girl #2: I guess. I mean, I guess they fit together. What's her name anyway?
Girl #1: I don't know, “r” something.


Overheard by:

Tipsy girl: You know what type of night it is? I’m wearing a leopard-print dress and leggings! It’s that type of night!