Man on cell: So I told the guy, “Your current girlfriend is my wife.”
Mall
Savannah, Georgia
Man on cell: So I told the guy, “Your current girlfriend is my wife.”
Mall
Savannah, Georgia
Moviegoer: I thought Carla didn't have a boyfriend because she got frumpy.
Landmark Theater
Los Angeles, California
Girl, holding up white lacey underwear with text across the ass: “Just married”? Shit, they should make a version that says “just divorced.”
Victoria's Secret
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McFreaky
Hipster: So my girlfriend was sketching me naked when I went home. So I was sitting there, you know… naked. And then her parents walked in.
Boston, Massachusetts
Loud guy on cell: So that's like, what, a 90% ratio of girls who have gotten pregnant right after I dated them? (bursts out laughing)
Girl to friend: Wow, I want him as my next boyfriend!
LSU
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: the things you hear when you go to class early….
Friend #1: I totally agree about simple dates. I think a great date would be for me and a guy to just ride a concubine together.
(pause)
Friend #2: You mean a “combine”?
Kansas City, Missouri
Tall chick: I wish I could find a nice, tall guy.
Friend #1: My brother is 6’5″.
Tall chick: Is he cute?
Friend: Well…
Friend #2: He looks like a Mexican pedophile.
Tall chick: 6’5″, eh? I’ll think about it.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Teenage girl on cell: I hung out with that camel.
Eagle, Idaho
Overheard by: Giles
Girl: So I asked him: “When are you going to come back for a reunion? I miss you!” and he was like: “I miss you so much I’ve had to replace you with alcohol.” That’s like, the biggest, best compliment ever! They should make a Hallmark card that says that.
West Lafayette, Indianapolis
Overheard by: Kolja
Drunk girl applying lip gloss: I can’t believe he broke up with me. I gave him the blow job of his life last night!
Napper Tandy’s Bathroom
Raleigh, North Carolina
