Drunk girl, pointing to apartment across the street: Look! The elevator goes up and down! It's so cool!
Sober girl: Yeah…they tend to do that.
Drunk girl: Shut up! (pause) But this one lights up! Oh, look! There it goes again!
London
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: The D.D. for the night
Upset girl on cell: When I say I'm going to call and I don't call, I just don't see why you can't call to see why I didn't call!
Fort Bragg, North Carolina
Gay professor: Yeah, so running through these questions should go a little more smoothly this time around. I looked around for what was causing it to go so slow last time, and I realized that there are disadvantages to letting your 14-year-old take your laptop to Tahoe for the weekend. I mean, really–how much lesbian porn can three teenage boys download? (class laughs) So, uh. If anything pops up, you know who to blame. I mean, it certainly isn't my secret fetish.
San Francisco State University, California
Overheard by: It isn't mine, either.
Woman on library's computer to son: Get away from the books and sign up for a computer. That's the only way you're goin' to learn!
Hawthorne Library
Hawthorne, California
Overheard by: Scott A. Willis
40-something tourist woman: But is it beneficial for your toaster?
40-something tourist woman #2: Umm…do I really have to answer that?
Underground Mall
Montreal, Canadia
Overheard by: Yes, yes you do.
Eight-year-old bratty boy at the top of the stairs: Elevators would be nice.
Robert E. Lee's Mansion, Arlington National Cemetery
Arlington, Virginia
