North Carolina

Black lady on cell: I said, ‘Yeah, I’m black, but dat don’ mean I be makin’ counterfeit money!’

Food Lion
Sanford, North Carolina

Overheard by: Elizabeth

Student #1: The professor wanted us to list our ten favorite books.
Student #2: So?
Student #1: All I could think of was “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie.”

East Carolina University
Greenville, North Carolina

Hot drunk chick: That’s why I can’t sleep at night — because people in Knoxville wanna fuck dogs!

Barley’s Taproom and Pizzeria
North Carolina

Overheard by: Drunk Patron

PA: Paging arriving passenger Juan Sanchez from Mexico City. Please return to gate B4 to retrieve your piñata.

Charlotte, North Carolina

Five‐year boy in front of a door: (frantically) Which one? I have to go!
Exasperated mother: The men’s room.
Little boy: Which one?!
Mother: That one (points) and that’s why you need to learn to read.

Barnes & Noble
Cary, North Carolina

Professor: I urge you to visit the TA as well, because we have complementary viewpoints. For example, he’s with it… and I’m not.

UNC‐Chapel Hill
North Carolina

Overheard by: Li’l Bit

College chick: I, like, physically cannot get good grades… I think the problem is in my brain.

University of North Carolina — Chapel Hill
Chapel Hill, North Carolina

Overheard by: KAT

Pretty girl to boyfriend: I don’t know if I have too many toothpicks, or not enough.
Boyfriend: So this is where the crazy starts?

Grocery Store
Havelock, North Carolina

Hipster girl #1: Those are nice (points at earrings), where did you get them?
Hipster girl #2: Oh, I stole these. I only steal earrings, for some reason. So did your parents ever get those goats for their farm?
Hipster girl #1: Not yet, but my mom said they’re going to start growing pot.
Hipster girl #2: That’s cool.

Durham, North Carolina

Overheard by: Vincent Ignatius

Guy on cell: I don’t think we’ll be in a bar, considering what we’ll be wearing and that we’ll be covered in feathers.

Chapel Hill, North Carolina