Ghetto woman #1: Oooh, I like them shorts.
Ghetto woman #2: I know, girl. My buttcheeks hang all out in them. I’m going to wear them to the club and find me a good man.
Wet Seal
Bradenton, Florida
Overheard by: Rae Crider
Ghetto woman #1: Oooh, I like them shorts.
Ghetto woman #2: I know, girl. My buttcheeks hang all out in them. I’m going to wear them to the club and find me a good man.
Wet Seal
Bradenton, Florida
Overheard by: Rae Crider
Crazy lady wearing only a bra: Well, my daddy says we should take my show on the road. I’m a singer, you know. I’m famous in Eastern Europe.
Dumbfounded drunk girls: Uh-huh… Totally.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Kari Nott
Huge guy waving Bud Light bottle at old Native American lady: There’s a reason I like ladies without any teeth.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Punk rocker: I was in the paper for being a hero, but I wasn’t really. I just shoved some kid’s intestines back inside him and covered it with duct tape and drove him at a hundred and forty-five miles per hour to the hospital.
Overheard by: http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/
Frat monkey: Here’s a naked pic of my girl [shows photo on cell]…
Drunk frat friend: Nice. [Pulls out his own cell.] Here’s a picture of my dick.
Caves Bar
Arlington, Texas
Overheard by: Not impressed
Guy: I’ve decided not to have an orgasm for the rest of the week.
Girl: God! Why?! You can’t have too many orgasms. It’s not like drinking too much!
Guy: I decide a lot of things.
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Abstemious
Pilot over intercom, as plane touches down: … And the crowd goes wild! Woo-hoo!
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: errica
Man, about preteen: She was being such a good penguin that I wished that I had some extra fish to give her.
Delaware
Mormon girl #1: I totally can’t believe we just did that. I love it.
Mormon girl #2: We’re so scandalous.
Mormon girl #1: Well… We’re scandalous in an appropriate way.
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: jules
