Body parts

Chick to friend: Seriously, smell my face!

University Village
Riverside, California

Bar fly to another entering bathroom: … And don’t go sticking your dick in my kebab again!


Overheard by: Algy_non

Loud girl: Why would she have sex with a head injury?

Creepster: The penis hole showcases my spare tire rather well.


Macho dude in Student Government Association: I'll smite you with my boobs!

Tunxis Community College, Connecticut

Overheard by: Girl in Black

18-year-old guy #1: Dude, I hate when she sticks her fingers in my ears.
18-year-old guy #2: Wait, so that doesn't turn you on?

Overheard by: luke.

Lazy construction worker: Watch out, that stuff is hot!
Busy construction worker: It's okay, my fingers are used to the heat. I used to have habits.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Kendra

College dude: I'd totally fuck her bottom half… and I'd just chomp off her top half.

San Jose, California

Overheard by: Skye

Friend #1: I just want a Dance Dance Revolution mat that won't skid around on the floor while I dance on it. I am thinking about covering my old one in an unskiddable material.
Friend #2: Well, you could try human skin.
Friend #1: Does it skid?
Friend #2: Only when wet.

Omaha, Nebraska.

Professor: Is that fist in the air a hand-up for a comment or are you just fisting for fun?

Vancouver, BC

Overheard by: Martha Carscadden