Guy #1: So, it’s cold outside — should we take the underground tunnel?
Guy #2: I dunno… It’s kind of sketchy down there. Don’t blame me if we get raped by a gang of chimpanzees.
Montreal
Canadia
Guy #1: So, it’s cold outside — should we take the underground tunnel?
Guy #2: I dunno… It’s kind of sketchy down there. Don’t blame me if we get raped by a gang of chimpanzees.
Montreal
Canadia
Teacher: It should be written in the dress code, ‘Girls with bouncy boobs need to cover them up.’ Seriously! These girls are one bounce away from getting tips!
Jackson Memorial High School
New Jersey
Overheard by: Diana
Professor: So, the point of this lecture is never, ever buy a squirrel monkey. They will plot your demise and gouge your eyes out in your sleep.
DePaul University
Chicago, Illinois
Dad to two-year-old daughter, before dropping her off at daycare: What are you going to do with the other kids today? … You should teach them all to be cage-fighters!
Ada, Ohio
Overheard by: Marci
Cute chick on cell: No, I’m on my way to work. Come visit me there! … No, it’s not weird! … Well, yeah, it’s a sex shop, but it’s a boutique sex shop!
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Want her business card
Hippie woman on cell: I don’t care what you wear. Just wear something that you’re okay getting Jell-O on… Yes, J-E-L-L-O.
Syracuse, New York
Overheard by: paula-t
Four-year-old to mom: Mom, you should get a new husband — one that will do more stuff with us. And Daddy can get a new wife — a skinny wife.
Orlando, Florida
Man with camera: No, smile. There’s no frowning allowed on MySpace anymore. It’s a rule. If you want your picture there, you have to smile.
Six-year-old son: Okay.
Man, to other young son: And you — be serious. No, not like that. Beyond serious. Like you lost your dog — that serious. No, even more — like you lost your truck!
Ice rink
Asheville, North Carolina
Teacher: You will build a car from a mouse trap.
Student #1: Those things are dangerous!
Teacher: What?
Student #1: People have died from them!
Student #2: Who’s died from a mousetrap?
Student #1: Over 16 babies have been killed by mousetraps.
Teacher, after pause: People, keep your babies away from it.
http://overheardinhighschool.blogspot.com/
Young black dude to white dude: … And don’t ever use Viagra unless you really need it. My balls were itching like crazy.
Modesto, California
Overheard by: Donster
