We Thought Only Americans Knew This Little About Sex Ed.

[Line for ladies’ room]Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It’s urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh…[Suppresses laugh.] 

Western Australia

Pissed‐off teen: You can’t get a bowl of salad but you can wash the dog naked?

Harrison, Michigan

Overheard by: Lauren

Girl #1: Do you think I could wash my clothes with fabric softener? I don’t have any detergent.
Girl #2: That should probably work.
(30 minutes later)
Girl #2: So, did it work?
Girl #1: Yeah… I think… they don’t smell anymore, at least. Good enough, right?

Laundry Room, University of Alabama
Birmingham, Alabama

Overheard by: I don’t think it is

Guy talking too loudly on cell phone: Honestly, if you took a dump and smeared it all over my chest, you know, in my face and all that, I?d be fine. Actually I might not, thats pretty extreme, but you know…

Asian hipster: People stare at him, and he resents them for staring at him. But I’m like, ‘Maybe you should bathe!‘
Jewish hipster: You should give him an elephant tranquilizer or something.

Overheard by: Glowien

Passerby to friend (excitedly): We should so sell bottled dirt!

Manhattan, Kansas

Overheard by: Nicole

Party guy: Hey, you cut your hair.
Party girl: I had to.
Party guy: Why?
Party girl: Well, you threw up on it!
Party guy: Who cares if I threw up on it?
Party girl: I do!
Party guy: Oh. (walks off)

Austin, Texas

Four‐year‐old ballerina #1: I need to ask my mom.
Four‐year‐old ballerina #2: That’s good, because my house is crap.
Pre‐ballerina: Well, it’s not crap — we just have a lot of crap in it.
Four‐year‐old ballerina #1: Can I come over to your place and play?

Dance studio

Worried suit: That’s why we get our chairs cleaned more than any other department. We get our chairs cleaned every three months. Why doesn’t anyone put a stop to this?

Metro Bus
Seattle, Washington

Woman #1 in central Taipei: When she went to the us, she took along several boxes of detergent, because she doesn’t like the smell of American detergent.
Woman #2: Yeah, I wouldn’t want to smell like an American either.

Overheard by: Yugan