Aikido student: Um, Sensei, I think there's spit on the mat…
Sensei: There's sweat on the mat?
Aikido Student: No, spit.
Sensei: Oh, spit! That's gross!
Humboldt State University
Arcata, California
Overheard by: Eli
Aikido student: Um, Sensei, I think there's spit on the mat…
Sensei: There's sweat on the mat?
Aikido Student: No, spit.
Sensei: Oh, spit! That's gross!
Humboldt State University
Arcata, California
Overheard by: Eli
Semi-drunk girl in pub crawl attire: I hate Windex, but I fuckin' love Febreze!
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: History Major
[Line for ladies’ room]Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It’s urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh…[Suppresses laugh.]
Western Australia
Australia
Pissed-off teen: You can't get a bowl of salad but you can wash the dog naked?
Harrison, Michigan
Overheard by: Lauren
Girl #1: Do you think I could wash my clothes with fabric softener? I don't have any detergent.
Girl #2: That should probably work.
(30 minutes later)
Girl #2: So, did it work?
Girl #1: Yeah… I think… they don't smell anymore, at least. Good enough, right?
Laundry Room, University of Alabama
Birmingham, Alabama
Overheard by: I don't think it is
Guy talking too loudly on cell phone: Honestly, if you took a dump and smeared it all over my chest, you know, in my face and all that, I?d be fine. Actually I might not, thats pretty extreme, but you know…
http://www.overheardatumbc.com
Asian hipster: People stare at him, and he resents them for staring at him. But I’m like, ‘Maybe you should bathe!’
Jewish hipster: You should give him an elephant tranquilizer or something.
http://overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com/2007/05/people-in-valley-like-elephants-what-is.html
Overheard by: Glowien
Passerby to friend (excitedly): We should so sell bottled dirt!
KSU
Manhattan, Kansas
Overheard by: Nicole
Party guy: Hey, you cut your hair.
Party girl: I had to.
Party guy: Why?
Party girl: Well, you threw up on it!
Party guy: Who cares if I threw up on it?
Party girl: I do!
Party guy: Oh. (walks off)
Austin, Texas
Four-year-old ballerina #1: I need to ask my mom.
Four-year-old ballerina #2: That’s good, because my house is crap.
Pre-ballerina: Well, it’s not crap — we just have a lot of crap in it.
Four-year-old ballerina #1: Can I come over to your place and play?
Dance studio
Maryland
