Chick on cell: David Hasselhoff just brushed past me. Mooing.
Coachella Music Festival
Indio, California
Overheard by: Brokeass Harem
Chick on cell: David Hasselhoff just brushed past me. Mooing.
Coachella Music Festival
Indio, California
Overheard by: Brokeass Harem
Boy in bar: Why does everyone always make me out to be the poo guy?
Oaktown, California
Overheard by: sitting further away now
Teen girl to classmates: Jesus was not a President!
US History Class, High School
San Diego, California
Preppy girl: I love not wearing pants.
[Friends start to laugh.]Preppy girl: No! I mean have you ever gone to the beach and –you just take off your bottoms and –no! I mean you like take off your swimsuit bottoms–.
[Friends erupt in laughter.]Preppy girl: I just mean –I just like not wearing pants…
High School
San Diego, California
Police officer to college girls: It turns out there was a midget in the closet.
Downtown Palo Alto, California
Spanish prof: What’s the difference between a stone and a rock, English speakers?
Student #1: A stone is smooth and near water.
Student #2: A rock is big, like you can’t pick it up.
Spanish prof: Well, that would make sense. I mean, we stone people to death, we don’t rock them to death.
Cute girl student: It’s happened before.
De Anza Community College
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl has a little crush on her
Barista guy, gesturing toward mug of Sharpies: Are you aware that these markers cost ninety-nine cents each?
Barista chick: Are you aware that I want to get my nipples pierced?
Starbuck’s, Castro Street
Mountain View, California
Overheard by: touché
American guy: Hmm, what should we have for desert?
French girl: I’ve been craving crab cakes. With frosting.
American guy: Uhh, you mean cupcakes?!
3rd St West Hollywood
Los Angeles, California
Angry suit on cell: I cleaned out my ass for you, bitch!
On the Street
San Francisco, California
Guy: I would ask her out, but she’s just so dumb. I mean, like, soo dumb.
Girl: Can’t you just overlook that for one night?
Guy: She’s not quite cute enough.
San Jose, California
