Woman: Why does it smell like something's burning? Maybe it's my flesh…(sniffs hand) Nope!
Benicia, California
Overheard by: Liz
Woman: Why does it smell like something's burning? Maybe it's my flesh…(sniffs hand) Nope!
Benicia, California
Overheard by: Liz
Energetic little boy: Can I punch him?
Harassed mom: You can punch him later.
Lake Arrowhead, California
(math test is interrupted by a loud construction drill in the next room).
Student: Oh my god, I can't take this test anymore! Can you tell them to stop, please?!
Teacher: Heh… At least there aren't bullets flying over your head.
Concord High School
California
Overheard by: When I was in Vietnam
Gay friend: I wish him the best in all his endeavors, and whatever his life is like now… But I hope he gets shot when he comes out here to Mardi Gras.
San Diego, California
Guy #1: You’re beautiful… you’re beautiful.
Guy #2: No… but I’m not fuckable beautiful!
University of California, San Diego
Overheard by: whoa mango
Drunk guy: It’s my birthday and I wanna hear some boobs clapping!
Davis, California
Overheard by: Liz
Dumb girl: So what’s the difference between when the guy hits the ball and someone catches it and when someone hits the ball and no one catches it?
Boy: Absolutely nothing.
PETCO Park
San Diego, California
Girl: I really don’t know why I have such an unhealthy obsession with lesbians.
Bakersfield, California
Old lady to friend: I’ve been praying for the strength to be friendly with Nicole*, but she makes it so difficult! Goddamit, I am going to heaven, so either she has to shape up soon or I have to try not to die!
San Jose, California
Customer (ordering a birthday cake for his wife): Can you put “You’re better lookin’ than your twin sister” on it?
Alpine Bakery
Concord, California
