Chemistry lecturer: Is it just me, or are those people getting more and more naked up the back there?
Melbourne University
Australia
Chemistry lecturer: Is it just me, or are those people getting more and more naked up the back there?
Melbourne University
Australia
Girl, observing a display of plush microbes: I want herpes! I think it’s so cute!
SUNY
Geneseo, New York
Overheard by: Jeni
Student: So if I, like, read something in the library and I memorize it, am I, like, stealing it with my mind?
Instructor: Yes. You can steal things with your mind.
Copy Editing Class
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Male art student: I’m in a creative writing class and I’ve been writing a lot of stories about mayonnaise.
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Jewish man: I am not sexist!
Jewish man’s friend: You are so sexist Archie Bunker is embarrassed.
Jewish man: I’m not sexist. I’ll stab a chick in her junk!
Israeli Martial Arts Class
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Ari
Professor: So the wars of opium wars were fought because the Chinese didn’t want their citizens smoking their bongos and being loopy.
Student: Wait, bongos?
Professor: Yeah those pipe things… Bongos, right?
Michigan State University
East Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Erika
[Girl leaves class in the middle of a lesson]Professor: She didn’t like what I was saying? I’m so upset, I’m going to go to the garden and eat fuzzy worms.
Marist College
Poughkepsie, New York
Overheard by: Nik
Professor: Can anyone give me an example of an equal relationship?
Student: Husband and wife?
Professor: Oh, you’re so idealistic…
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Philosophy professor: Whatever you do guys, you can’t let Descartes come through the back door!
Students: [Laugh hysterically.]Philosophy professor: It’s not funny! Descartes always tries to come through the back door!
University of Portland
Oregon
Overheard by: B Student
