20-something guy: I could do this all day. If you left me alone in a room with my hand, I could entertain myself all day.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Lauren
20-something guy: I could do this all day. If you left me alone in a room with my hand, I could entertain myself all day.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Lauren
Man on cell (angrily): Your sister keeps jerking me off… Well, not me, but your mother.
University of Hawaii, Hilo
(guy grabs girl's hand and licks cotton candy off her finger and licks finger)
Girl: Be careful, you don't where these fingers have been.
Guy: Well, I know last night they were in your vagina.
Girl: Shhh! People can hear you!
Guy: No one's even listening to us!
San Diego, California
Guy #1: What are you going to get your girlfriend for her birthday?
Guy #2: I got her this sweater she wanted. But I'm also going to get her a dildo in case she doesn't like the sweater. That way she can go fuck herself.
Roosevelt Field Mall
Long Island, New York
Dude: Just because you masturbate to llama/turtle porn…
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
