Serenades Sure Have Changed Since the Renaissance

Student girl: And then these tramps started wanking off outside my window!

Manchester Aquatics Centre
England

Overheard by: Noo

Posted on February 11, 2009
Default, England, Girls, Masturbation, Students, Weirdness, Words

I Told My Dad It Was a Sports Injury. He's Never Been Prouder.

Emo boy: Matt! Tell her how you fucked up your face!
Matt: I was rubbing one out in the shower and when I came, my knees gave out and I hit my head on the faucet.
Emo girl (gasping and laughing hysterically): That is best thing I have ever heard!

Starbucks
New Mexico

Posted on January 20, 2009
Body parts, Default, Girls, Guys, Happiness, Health & Hygiene, Masturbation, New Mexico, Restaurants

That's When the Real Fun Begins

Frat boy to others: So you masturbate in a cup, right? Then you freeze it, and in the morning mix it with your protein powder.

George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia

Overheard by: red

Posted on December 25, 2008
Advice, Colleges & Universities, Cum, Default, Food, Frat boy types, Masturbation, Virginia, Weirdness

…While Making Waffles with the Other

Woman to man: I mean, you could have masturbated with one arm, come on.

UMass
Massachusetts

Posted on December 23, 2008
Body parts, Default, Massachusetts, Masturbation, Weirdness, Women

Okay, See Ya Later!

Porn-'stached scuzzball: I mean, if you ever, like, masturbated, you'd know that smell.

Robinson, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: And I Go To College With You??

Posted on December 19, 2008
Default, Etiquette, Guys, Masturbation, Pennsylvania, Sensory experiences, Weirdness

Eh, My Sister Does the Same Thing

Biology professor: And don't play frisbee with a beluga whale. They've been known to masturbate with them.

University of Mississippi

Posted on December 19, 2008
Advice, Animals, Colleges & Universities, Default, Masturbation, Mississippi, Teachers, Weirdness

Next Altoona Will Give Women the Right to Vote

(in a philosophy class, the subject of “lovemaking vs. fucking” is being discussed)
Angry feminist student: Guys have it so easy! You can go out and fuck any girl you want and no one thinks any worse of you, but if a girl sleeps around she's a slut! Hell, if you somehow don't manage to nail the girl, you can just go home and masturbate. Girl's can't do that!
Female student who hadn't spoken a word all class: Pff, yes we can!

Penn State
Altoona, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: A guy in the same class

Posted on December 2, 2008
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Gender issues, Girls, Masturbation, Pennsylvania, Sexuality, Students

We Have a Winner

Girl #1: I'm 20-orgasms horny!
Girl #2: I'm 100-orgasms horny!
Girl #3: I'm masturbate-in-my-class horny!
Girl #1: I'm stick-a-banana-in-my-ass horny!

Syracuse University, New York

Overheard by: gelatinous