Hoochie: If I could get a hundred bucks just for showing my titties on Jerry Springer, I’d so do it.
Chicago, Illinois
Hoochie: If I could get a hundred bucks just for showing my titties on Jerry Springer, I’d so do it.
Chicago, Illinois
Pre-hipster eyeing Harvard t-shirt: What do you mean you can't afford it? But you graduated from there. Isn't that the whole point of going there?
Prudential Mall
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by:
Very well-behaved boy: Mom, I have been so good lately, can I please get a toy?
Very patient mom: Do you have any money?
Very well-behaved boy: Um… no, but you do. I looked in your wallet this morning.
Very patient mom: That's snooping!
Very well-behaved boy: Well, daddy does it all the time!
Salem, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Jenna
Gay son: I need a sugar daddy.
Mother: You and me both.
Gay son: But I have a booty.
Mother, after long pause, and looking out the window: I have weeds where I once had grass…
Murrieta, California
Overheard by: I hope I don't become my mother
Elderly man to elderly gaggle: Why's everyone wasting their time trying to raise money for Africa? Africa's a wretched country.
Max's German Restaurant
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Ladle
Scruffy guy: Shit, I'd suck dick for money. I've always kind of wished I was a girl so I could be a stripper… or a whore.
Gainesville, Florida
Sociology professor: This course is cheap, but I'm expensive, so please make use of me.
Boston University, Massachusetts
Guy on cell: Yeah, I get scared when you turn out the lights. (pause) That's not gay. (pause) It's not gay when “turning out the lights” means putting your hands over my eyes while we're test-driving a car that's worth more than your sister's gold plated vahjay!
George Mason University
Virginia
Overheard by: Your sister won
Man: You spunt all our money!
Woman: Fuck you! You spunt the money — that’s who spunt the money!
Wal-Mart
Wichita, Kansas
