Mom, oblivious to sons sliding on ice through parking lot: So, I guess we want a tree that’s really tall, but not too wide…
Lady, wincing every time boys slide near a moving car: Wow, those two must be a handful, huh?
Mom: Oh, yeah. Actually, I have three, but the youngest is at home because he broke his neck and he’s too hard to cart around.
Syracuse, New York
Little boy wearing necklace: Mom, can I change my name to ‘Elizabeth’?
Frazzled mom: No, I told you — that’s a girl’s name, and you’re a boy.
Little boy: Well, can I change to a girl?
Frazzled mom: Not until you’re eighteen.
Wegmans
Rochester, New York
Frustrated brunette: I just wish he would leave me alone! He’s always following me!
Friend #1: I know. I’m sorry, sweetie.
Frustrated brunette: What can I do? Maybe I can change the way I look so he won’t recognize me.
Friend #2, after long pause: You could cut off your legs!
Ithaca College
New York
Overheard by: LadyDisdain
Girl on cell in stall: She’s crazy. She called me this weekend saying that she had been kidnapped. Isn’t that weird? No, I didn’t call her back.
Library restroom, Westchester Community College
Valhalla, New York
Overheard by: Catie
Dude playing Wii: That’s gonna be my one year anniversary with my Wii. I should take it out and buy it a purse…
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Poor college kid #1: So, you used to break into cars?
Poor college kid #2: Yeah.
Poor college kid #1: How was that?
Rochester, New York
Dude standing in line: Because when I see Kit Kats, I think home pregnancy tests.
Wegmans
Rochester, New York
Female cashier on cell while ringing up items: Of course I wash my hands after I go to the bathroom! [Long pause, then smirks flirtatiously.] Ew, Jonathon! [Lowers voice] I don’t do that to myself — especially not into my hands…
Staples
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: very amused
20-something: Alright! Smells like booze on the plane.
Overprotective mom: No, that’s just my hand sanitizer.
Flight to Buffalo, New York
Buxom girl wearing strapless dress with no bra: I feel like my tits are really low. Do they look really low?
Van Housen Hall, Potsdam College
Potsdam, New York
Overheard by: minibab
