Smokin' hot gay guy on phone: I bought the table under the impression that it was fuck-proof. My husband challenged me last night to prove otherwise. Now my table has been fucked through and Mark* isn't talking to me right now. (pause) Yeah, it does sound like a funny problem to have, but it's really not.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: The Sauce
Dude: If you don't come along, I'll have your first-born child sodomized. By a moose.
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Guy: We could have been run over by trucks or seagulls.
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Nik
Girl, looking at bag of coffee: Tan-zay-nee-uh. Hey, I didn't know that was a country!
(friends laugh)
Girl: That's a pretty name, I'm going to name my daughter that!
Starbucks
Manhattan, New York
Young boyfriend, trying to weasel out of seeing Legally Blonde 2: I… I just don't think I'm emotionally ready for the uncut version. Do you think I'm ready? I don't.
Young girlfriend: You should have pulled the “it might make me gay” card.
Friend: I think his way was more gay.
Young girlfriend: Which concerns me…
Scotrun, New York
Mother to five-year-old: Keep moving, we don't want to be in the first car. If the train crashes, we'd be done for.
Metro North Railroad
New York City, New York
Overheard by: BOB Sled
Woman: Do you remember topless movie night?
Man: No. First I’ve heard of this.
Woman, shocked: It was at your apartment!
Denny’s restaurant
East Greenbush, New York
Overheard by: conrad jones
Girl to friends: I mean, if you’re talking about who he’s technically going out with, then she’s the girlfriend and I’m the other woman. But, I mean… If you’re talking about who he confides in more, I’m the girlfriend and she’s the other woman.
Dobbs Ferry, New York
Overheard by: Lex
Drunk JAP, yelling at boyfriend: I can't deal with your shit anymore! You don't respect me, you ridicule me in front of my friends. You tell me my dog doesn't deserve to live in a house as big as mine! I don't want to live like this!
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Jill and Weenie
