Otherwise My Tech Support Job Will Be Obsolete

Girl on cell: Well, I don’t care if they kill fucking humans; just don’t fucking kill the worms!

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/10/long-overdue-update-part-2.html

Overheard by: hearstoomuch

Posted on November 26, 2014
Murder, On the phone, Overheard at Cornell

… And That the First Rule of Jerry Is “Don’t Talk about Jerry”

Drunk girl, screaming: I’ve got rules! Rule number one: Jerry is a pussy! Rule number two: Jerry is a pussy! Rule number three: … Um, I forgot where I was going with this.

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/05/huge-update.html

Overheard by: lola

Posted on November 23, 2014
Drunks, Insults, Overheard at Cornell

What Do You Mean, That’s Too Graphic for My Wedding Vows?

Loud girl on cell: I dunno… I mean, it takes a lot for someone to make out with you after you’ve been puking.

Outside Goldwin Smith Hall
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/03/reticent.html

Posted on October 25, 2014
Colleges & Universities, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, On the phone, Overheard at Cornell

I Beholdin’ a Gram

Beholder: You are not a beholder, buddy.
Non-beholder: Nah, dude. I’m pretty sure I behold.

Duffield
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/03/reticent.html

Overheard by: benji

Posted on October 5, 2014
Dorks, Geeks & Nerds, Games, Overheard at Cornell

Global Warming Just Strikes Some People Harder

Guy: Do you guys ever get giant puddles underneath you in class?
Weary friend: Yes.
Guy: Mine always seems to be so much bigger than everyone else’s.

Becker Dorm
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/02/monday-sometimes-is-like-being-shot-in.html

Overheard by: ad’a

Posted on October 4, 2014
Health & Hygiene, Overheard at Cornell, Questions, Students

Be Considerate of the Rest of Us

Jock: No, dude, you totally have to use a condom with a plastic vagina.

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/10/sundays-suck.html

Overheard by: hung

Posted on September 19, 2014
Advice, Condoms, Jocks, Overheard at Cornell, Vagina

Nothing Like Taking an Exam in the Afterglow

Frat boy #1: I already jacked off three times today!
Frat boy #2: Sweet! That’s what I’m going to do as soon as I finish this test.
Frat boy #1: Maybe I should just go rub one out in the bathroom now… [He leaves the room.]

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/01/breaks-broke.html

Overheard by: Maxwell

Posted on September 18, 2014
Class, Frat boy types, Masturbation, Overheard at Cornell

Which Is a Fancy Word That Means ‘Requiring a Splint’

Sororitard: I mean, he has, like, clinical depression. That’s like breaking your arm. It’s, like, hereditary.

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/01/sundays-best.html

Overheard by: dek

Posted on September 17, 2014
Overheard at Cornell, Sorority types, Stupidity

Apparently I’ve Never Experienced 115 Degree Heat

Freshman girl: It’s so much better when it’s cold than it is when it’s warm — all you can do when it’s 115 degrees out is sit around and air out your vagina flaps!

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/11/ten-days-all-at-once-huge-update.html

Overheard by: broyhaha

Posted on September 17, 2014
Overheard at Cornell, Students, Vagina, Weather

Our “Paddles” Are Just Irons with Strings Attached, Anyway

Walkie-talkie of student EMT #1: Two-car motor vehicle accident, minor injuries…
Student EMT #2: Dude… How far away is that? We should go… I’m bored.
Student EMT #1: Nah, let’s get some ice cream.

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/12/big-honking-update.html

Overheard by: scott

Posted on September 13, 2014
Jobs & Careers, Overheard at Cornell, Students

Overheard at Cornell