Coworkers

Employee #1: Do you know what the problem is with rice cakes?
Employee #2: What?
Employee #1: There’s no meat in them.

Super Target
Virginia

Overheard by: Brian

Gas station worker #1, pointing to arm: … And right here is where I got stabbed.
Gas station worker #2: No way! That’s the exact same place I got stabbed! Same arm, too!

Pittsford, New York

Overheard by: Rook

Bellhop #1: Oops… Almost forgot to bring my blueberry and honey-flavored tea!
Bellhop #2: Don’t forget your vagina.

The Cliff House
Manitou Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: AR

New male employee: You shouldn’t open the lettuce like that.
Old female employee: Don’t tell me how to do my fucking job!
Manager, yelling from across store: Watch out! She’ll cut you!

Jimmy John’s
Charleston, Illinois

Overheard by: I just want my sandwich

20-something #1: Let's get into publishing.
20-something #2: Only if it's porn.
20-something #1: Well, of course.
20-something #2: For women. Graphic pornography for women.
20-something #1: I think they already have that.
20-something #2: Giant diamond encrusted wangs, artfully displayed on wedgewood.

Denver, Colorado

20-something girl: So I had to go to the emergency room because I thought I had a baby.
Shocked co-worker: What?! What was it?
20-something girl: Just my period. But it was a bad one.

Biloxi, Mississippi

Overheard by: don't ditch health class

Black teen employee to teen girl employee: Some of these people, they want to get to know you and make a connection, and I'm like, “man, I don't want to be your friend, I just want to give you a towel.”

Marino Center
Boston, Massachusetts

Coworker, about Dick Clark's New Year's Eve: For people our age it's just not New Year's until we see Dick.

Sanford, Florida

Comic book artist: Is the word “stab” or “poink” best for a dog nose being inserted into someone's butt?
Group of coworkers in unison, very serious: “Poink,” definitely.

Portland, Oregon

Younger heavy metal guy with older coworkers: I never find the right size of long johns in the winter, so I buy women's tights instead. (older coworkers look at him in shock) What? I was kidding! Morning humor, you know.
Macho guy sitting behind: Yeah, women's tights make your junk look bigger!

Commuter Train
Stockholm
Sweden

Overheard by: strictly boxers.