Hallmark salesgirl: My stomach really hurts.
Queer: Does your face hurt too?
Hallmark salesgirl (long pause): Oh my god, gross!
McLean, Virginia
Hallmark salesgirl: My stomach really hurts.
Queer: Does your face hurt too?
Hallmark salesgirl (long pause): Oh my god, gross!
McLean, Virginia
Drunk #1: It is loud in here.
Drunk #2: No, it isn't.
Drunk #1: Well, you aren't sitting over here.
Drunk #2: What?
Olathe, Kansas
Skanky girl: My hair smells like cum.
Gleneagle Secondary School
Vancouver
Canadia
Short girl #1: Mormons are like, on a mission, you know?
Short girl #2: And they smell bad!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Savannah
Dude #1: I think there's piss in my mouth…
Dude #2: Yeah man, that's piss-mouth, it happens.
Pemberton, BC
Canadia
Overheard by: Ben
Production assistant on film set: This gaffer's tape just doesn't taste good.
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: bond
Woman #1: My boss shaves his legs.
Woman #2: Really?
Woman #1: His legs, his back, his chest, everything. All guys do it now.
Woman #2: That's so weird. My son asked me to wax his chest because he said girls don't like hairy chests.
Woman #1: How much hair could a 14-year-old have?
Woman #2: Actually, a lot.
Woman #1: He's going to be really hairy when he's older.
Woman #2: Fortunately not on his back yet. So anyway–don't tell anybody I told you this. You're sworn to secrecy–I told him I wouldn't wax him, but I went out and bought some Nair and put it on him, and it worked. But the next morning, he was in such pain–his chest was all inflamed. He said he would never do it again.
Women's Gym
Studio City, California
Overheard by: I always eavesdrop on these two
Girl: My cooter smells like Zoodles…
North Bay
Ontario
Canadia
Drunk girl: I hear Michael Caine peeing!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
