Words

Woman: Wooo! It’s wetter than a nymphomaniac in a gangbang out there.
Man: You’ve been waiting to say that for a long time, haven’t you?

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Just Me

Little kid in bathroom with grandmother: Poopies, yay, yay! Poopies, yay yay!

Arby’s Bathroom
Howell, Michigan

Female voice over speakerphone: Maybe you shouldn’t listen to me. I just reached into my glass of milk to retrieve a cookie that I accidentally dropped to the bottom during dunking. Now I am covered in milk. I’ve got milk hands!
Fraternity guy: I thought you were trying to make your own metaphor, like “I don’t see the glass as half empty or half full, I see my hand in it retrieving cookies.”

Providence, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Wants No Part Of This

Attractive 30-year-old blond European woman: You can say it, say it, sayyyyyy it!
50-year-old well dressed Japanese man: Penis… penis… penis…

Ginza
Tokyo
Japan

Overheard by: Brian Milvid

Girl to fourteen classmates: I do *everything* in the bathroom!

The Melting Pot
New Jersey

Overheard by: supersecret!

Queer #1: You said: “Oooh, girl, you can’t build a pyramid on top of a pyramid.”
Queer #2: Did I say: “Oooh, girl”?! I did not say “Oooh, girl”!

Memphis, Tennessee

Overheard by: The Faghag

Woman on cell: That poor baby-mama! Or, shall I say: “wife”.

Cambridge, Massachusetts

Little boy, to stoic mother in shoe aisle: I love the night life! I like the boobies! I love the night life! I like the boobies!
(five minutes later, at checkout lane)
Little boy, to stoic mother: I love the night life! I like the boobies! I love the night life! I like the boobies!…

Kohl’s
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Me too, my man.

Mother to impatient son: Do you want to show me how you count?
Five-year-old: Ok. One. Two. Three. Fuck.
Mother: What!? Adam*, you know you’re not supposed to say…
Four-year-old: Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Mother: Adam*, I said stop! That’s a very, very bad word.
Four-year-old, putting hands on ears: You fuck, you fuck, you fuck.

Holt Renfrew
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: M

Girl in stall: I have paper stuck in my vagina.
Friend: You might not want to say that, there’s people here.
Girl in stall: Why is vagina a bad word?

Ladies Room, Foreplay Bar
Portland, Maine

Overheard by: How did it get there?