Don’t Have to Be Miss Cleo to Know How This Ends

Drunk guy #1 to guy he just met: I just get sick of people when they come over. My dad, my brother — after an hour, I’m sick of them.
Drunk guy #2: Oh, yeah?
Drunk guy #1: Yeah. And another thing I hate? Let’s say you come over tonight and spend the night — you can’t sleep on the couch.
Drunk guy #2: Why not? Where would I sleep?
Drunk guy #1: Because there are no sheets on it! I don’t want your body fluids on my couch. But you could sleep in the bed.

Panini’s
Cleveland Heights, Ohio

Overheard by: Is that an offer?

Posted on November 22, 2023
Drunks, Gripes, Ohio

Good Point. From Now on, I’ll Just Yell about Yours

Dude: So, is it true that you have herpes?
Drunk girl #1: What?! No!
Dude: Thank god!
Drunk girl #1: I had chlamydia and now I have HPV. I only told two people, and now the whole town thinks I have herpes!
Dude: [Stares.]Drunk girl #1, crying: Why does everyone know about my diseases?!
Drunk girl #2: Because you go to the bar, get trashed, and yell about it?

Bar
Newark, Ohio

Posted on November 1, 2023
Drunks, Ohio, STDs

Well, What about McDonald’s?

Father looking at sign: Look! You could work here when you start school.
Son: Why would I want to work here? They can’t even spell ‘prerequisite’ right.
Father: That’s because it’s per-quisite.

Ohio

Overheard by: glad to be sharing a school with this kid

Posted on September 26, 2023
Dads, Ohio, Words

Well, Okay — I’ll Try Anything Once

Customer to clerk: Maybe my idea of sex is sticking a drill in your head.

Visible Voice Books
Cleveland, Ohio

Overheard by: phoebe

Posted on September 6, 2023
Creepsters, Kink, Ohio

I’ve Heard Good Things about It

11-year-old boy: Let’s go fuck some girls!

Delhi Skatepark
Cincinnati, Ohio

Posted on August 11, 2023
Kids, Ohio, Sex

At Least Stop Throwing the Panties.

Physics professor: Hey! Listen up! I’m tired of some of you walking out or ignoring me when we talk about the Big Bang Theory. I’m not telling you God doesn’t exist, so don’t get your panties in a bunch! You! Sit down! Let me finish!

Kent State University
Kent, Ohio