History teacher (hanging up posters with spray adhesive): If ya’ll get high from this, you’re welcome.
High School
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: thank you!
History teacher (hanging up posters with spray adhesive): If ya’ll get high from this, you’re welcome.
High School
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: thank you!
Drunk guy at bar: My life is an episode of Friends, only there's no girls, and everyone's Chandler.
Bar
Dayton, Ohio
Overheard by: Kristin
Guy: If she smokes, she pokes.
Piper High School
Florida
Second grade teacher: Okay, so if you are what you eat, what food would you be?
Student #1: Cake!
Student #2: Candy!
Student #3: Beer!
Second grade teacher: No, you can’t choose that. It’s illegal for you to drink beer.
Student #3: But I drink it all the time!
St. Catharine’s
Ontario
Canadia
Goofy man wearing “pimp” shirt and “I love boobies” bracelet: Yes! Our theater is closer to my bathroom. Ha ha, you lose!
Attractive brunette : You are the worst blind date ever!
Movie Theater
Monterey ,California
Overheard by: Arkham patient
Student: Hi professor, we need some help with our regressions.
Professor, cutting her off: Enough about you. I got a new dog yesterday, look I have a picture!
Student: Uhh… He’s cute?
Wellesley, Massachusetts
Little girl: Mom, those boots make you look like a hooker!
Mother: This conversation is over.
Little girl: Okay… What’s a hooker?
Macy’s, Marley Station Mall
Marley, Maryland
Overheard by: jd
Middle aged woman: I want him to think of me as the kind of friend who shakes your hand, not the friend you jump into bed with.
Northwestern University
Evanston, Illinois
Archaeology professor: That's a lot of work just for one hoe!
New Haven, Connecticut
Waitress: I told her, “my body is a temple, I'm just puttin' up wallpaper.”
Badin Lake, North Carolina
