Doing It with Your Teeth?

Girl #1: Whatever happened to that bird?
Guy: Which one? The original?
Girl #1: Yeah.
Guy: It’s in Professor Long’s* lab. I put it in a bag and squeezed the air out, so it shouldn’t be rotting too much.
Girl #2: It’s going to smell so bad when you open it.
Guy: No, it won’t…
Girl #2: Uh, yeah it will. You’d better open it up, drop it, and run away for a few hours.
Guy: Oh, come on, for Christ’s sake! After I removed the scent glands from a skunk with my bare hands and sawed its head off, what could be worse?!

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/01/breaks-broke.html

Overheard by: kinda creeped out

Posted on November 1, 2023
Animals, Death & dying, Overheard at Cornell, Students

Much Better Than That Stupid Mel Gibson Speech

Girl with fake sword to group of fifty kids with fake swords (prepping them before their war in the park): Today is not about living, today is about dying. You will die at least 100 times today. And you will love it!

Clark Park
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: afraid of kids

Posted on June 28, 2023
Death & dying, Default, Feelings, Games, Girls, Kids, Pennsylvania, Violence

Stop Making Your Eyes Glow This Minute, Missy!

Three-year-old daughter, passing Catholic church: Dead people live there.

Tucson, Arizona

Overheard by: Joe Oxford

Posted on June 16, 2023
Arizona, Death & dying, Kids

While a Choir Sings, My Liquified Remains Will Be Flushed Down a Golden Drain

College freshman: I keep making plans for my funeral, and they keep getting better!

San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Anne

Posted on May 30, 2023
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Death & dying, Default, Happiness, San Francisco, Students

We Can Bond by Watching the Footage Together Later

Mom: A 21-year-old girl from Oshkosh died today, but they aren’t saying how.
College daughter: A house blew up this morning… Well, a mobile home, actually.
Mom: And it killed that 21-year-old girl?!
College daughter: Well, no. They’re unrelated. Actually, I’m just trying to upstage you… But a house really did blow up.

Appleton, Wisconsin