College freshman: I keep making plans for my funeral, and they keep getting better!
San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Anne
College freshman: I keep making plans for my funeral, and they keep getting better!
San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Anne
Mom: A 21‐year‐old girl from Oshkosh died today, but they aren’t saying how.
College daughter: A house blew up this morning… Well, a mobile home, actually.
Mom: And it killed that 21‐year‐old girl?!
College daughter: Well, no. They’re unrelated. Actually, I’m just trying to upstage you… But a house really did blow up.
Appleton, Wisconsin
Tall gay 20‐something male on cell: My niece died. I need a Fresca.
CVS
Boston, Massachusetts
Woman #1: Hey! Look! Trees!
Woman #2: No, you can’t get one. Not after you killed the last one we gave you.
De Anza Flea Market
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl
Woman: I wish I hadn’t had hooters for breakfast!
Fitting Room
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
Bimbette on cell: I thought I’d died, and then gone to, like, not heaven.
University of Michigan
Ann Arbor, Michigan
20‐something hipster to friend: So…I’m officially out of corpses.
Friend: Dude!
Portland, Maine
Teenage ghetto boy: That’d be great, man, if everyone died … They’d be gone, and we could take all their cars!
Bus
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
Philosophy professor, proving his argument: Therefore, if I don’t get a little crazy, then I’m never gonna survive.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Overheard by: sjshock
Environmental science teacher: What, in your opinion, is the most pressing environmental issue our planet faces today?
Clueless redhead, raising hand unsurely: Is it… The birds?
Environmental science teacher: Excuse me?
Clueless redhead: Isn’t there something up with birds? Like, aren’t they dying or something?
Environmental science teacher: Um… Thousands of different animals are dying…
Clueless redhead: Oh. I thought it was just birds.
High School
Los Angeles, California