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Loud teen girl on cell: Jaime, I’ve been calling you! Didn’t you feel it in your pants?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/299422489/maybe-not.html

Overheard by: yikes

60-something female professor: Boys, you don't have this problem, but girls: always do your Kegels, especially after you have a baby.

Willamette University
Salem, Oregon

Girl #1: You're more likely to have a boy if the guy hasn't masturbated in awhile.
Girl #2: Really?
Girl #1: Yeah, my professor said so!

Sather Gate
UC Berkeley, California

Girl #1: My 21st birthday was fun.
Girl #2: So was mine, minus the fact that my friends bought stuffed animal beavers at the winery and proceeded to yell about how soft and hairy their beavers were… While my dad was driving.
Girl #2's grandma: What's a beaver?
Girl #2's mom: It's…what some people call the female genitalia.
Girl #2's grandma: Ohhh…your grandfather used to just call it a cunt.

San Francisco, California

Grandmother: -reflected in glass pane next to a picture of teddy roosevelt-.
Grandson: -perturbed- nana, why are you in the picture?!

Louisville, KY

Overheard by: Sniggering Intern

Woman to man carrying giant innertube: You have to return that to the tube hut. Ha! You have a tube hut in your pants!
Man: I don’t even know what that means.

Swimming Pool
Gardner, Kansas

Girl in math class: I mean, seriously. I've been pissing all over these quizzes lately.
Friend: I know, right? Me too.

Michigan State University

Traffic cop: She said, “Do you like it?” and I was like, “Yeah, it looks really nice.” And then she said, “Is it subtle?” and I was like “Jenny*, you’re a black woman with orange and yellow hair!”

Plymouth, Michigan

Overheard by: Morgz

Little girl to mom: This ice cream is screwing with my mind.

McDonald’s
Dayton, Ohio

Overheard by: heather

20-year-old female emo: So basically, after hours of arguing outside his house, I was so fed up I told him to fucking suck my dick.
30-year-old female friend: Wow, what happened after that?
20-year-old female emo: I left. He was being such a fucking cunt. I wanted to piss in his mouth. He made me drive home drunk!
30-year-old female friend: He could at least offer to like, let you spend the night.
20-year-old female friend: Like, I don't even know, he's such a bitch boyfriend. I honestly hopes he gets the herpes.
30-year-old female friend: You have such a dirty mouth.
20-year-old female emo: Oh, is my lipstick smudged or something?

Starbucks
San Francisco, California