Chick #1: I'm gonna have to break down and spring for a land line.
Chick #2: How come?
Chick #1: So I can find my cell phone in my apartment.
Starbucks
San Rafael, California
Overheard by: Where'd I put my coffee?
Chick #1: I'm gonna have to break down and spring for a land line.
Chick #2: How come?
Chick #1: So I can find my cell phone in my apartment.
Starbucks
San Rafael, California
Overheard by: Where'd I put my coffee?
Teenage waitress telling baby boomer male customer her medical issues: Yeah, and I got this tail thing right here. (points at lower back) It looks like I'm growing a tail.
Fatz Cafe
Lexington, South Carolina
Girl suit (walking by a fancy art studio pointing at the concrete): Oh my god! That's totally where Ashley peed on Saturday night!
Friend: We didn't even walk down this street!
Girl suit: Yes we did! Because that's the trash can you were passed out over, this is the corner where I ditched you.
7th & J
San Diego, California
Black girl to girlfriend: He's young, like 24, 25. And get this: I was like, “So, what else do you do?” and he goes “I make beats.” I said, “Of course you do.”
Subway
New York City, New York
Overheard by: EL
Freakishly tall chick: Could you imagine a primordial dwarf in my family? The kid would kill me as soon as they could wield a weapon of some kind, because I'd laugh at them so much.
Friend: Or he'd turn the hatred outwards, and be a serial killer. Oh man, could you imagine, a primordial dwarf serial killer?
Freakishly tall chick: That would be awesome.
Aurora, Colorado
Overheard by: Lee
(guy grabs girl's hand and licks cotton candy off her finger and licks finger)
Girl: Be careful, you don't where these fingers have been.
Guy: Well, I know last night they were in your vagina.
Girl: Shhh! People can hear you!
Guy: No one's even listening to us!
San Diego, California
Girl #1: He's kind of ugly.
Girl #2: He kind of reminds me of a marionette because his cheeks are shiny and puffed up all the time.
Black Market Vintage Clothing
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: kj
(two 6th-grade boys are sitting on the bus playing with their phones)
Boy #1: Hey, you know “saxophone” sounds a lot like “sexy-phone”!
Boy #2: Haha! Then for short you could call it “the sex”!
Boy #1: (laughs)
Boy #2: It would be like, “Hey, do you know how to play the sex?”
Boy #1: Heh-heh… Yeah, its a very complicated one.
Boy #2: Ew… That's gross.
Boy #1: Yeah, you know where you learn how to do it?
Boy #2: Where?
Boy #1: In college.
Boy #2: No way! I thought we learned everything in 5th grade.
Boy #1: Yeah…but I mean this time they tell you where to stick it in.
Boy #2: Ohhh…
School Bus
Maryland
Overheard by: Sam
