Annoying daughter: Ewww, don't order broccoli pizza. That's gross!
White trash mom: Smell my armpit.
Annoying daughter: Okay!
White trash mom: Here, smell this one too.
Roma Pizza
Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: grossed out
Annoying daughter: Ewww, don't order broccoli pizza. That's gross!
White trash mom: Smell my armpit.
Annoying daughter: Okay!
White trash mom: Here, smell this one too.
Roma Pizza
Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: grossed out
Hipster girl: I know a couple people who have to wear diapers when they drink!
Old Tavern Bar & Grill
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: kat
Waitress: What kind of dressing would you like on your salad? We have French, Thousand Island and Italian.
Gorgeous blond: I’ll have Ranch.
Waitress: No.
Glenwood Springs, Colorado
Girl to friend: Well, I woke up naked, again, with a quesadilla in my bed, again, so I say it was a pretty average night.
Eclipse de Sol Restaurant
Atlanta, Georgia
College girl #1: You laugh a lot during sex, then?
College girl #2: I think you have to laugh during sex. Otherwise it’s too solemn. I mean, sex is like: “Oh yeah, oh yeah, queef.”
Chinese Restaurant
Columbus, Mississippi
Overheard by: Megan S.
Suit to other: Then he kept trying to sell me this little boy for a dollar…
Taco Bell
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: Brandon
Girl: Do you know what a pearl necklace is?
Woman: I didn’t learn about any of that shit until I worked on the Senate floor.
Kokomo’s
Linglestown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: M.J.M.
20-something goth/thug girl: Remember the time I went to jail? I didn’t want to leave!
Denny’s
San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: I didn’t want to be at dennys
Girl to fourteen classmates: I do *everything* in the bathroom!
The Melting Pot
New Jersey
Overheard by: supersecret!
Balding yuppie guy on cell: All things being equal, I would like to drink.
(pause)
Balding yuppie guy on cell: Oh, so you guys are drinking in the convent?
Saxby’s Coffee
Georgetown, Washington, DC
