Hipster girl #1: Those are nice (points at earrings), where did you get them?
Hipster girl #2: Oh, I stole these. I only steal earrings, for some reason. So did your parents ever get those goats for their farm?
Hipster girl #1: Not yet, but my mom said they're going to start growing pot.
Hipster girl #2: That's cool.
Cafe
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: Vincent Ignatius
Guy on cell: I don't think we'll be in a bar, considering what we'll be wearing and that we'll be covered in feathers.
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Student to other: Do you have your uterus?
Duke Medicine
Durham, North Carolina
Queer #1: He punched him in the face right in the middle of Banana Republic.
Queer #2: That is so damn rude.
University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Redneck girl: So do you worship cows?
Hindu boy: Yes, that's part of our religion.
Redneck girl: No, I mean you. Do you worship cows?
Hindu boy: Yes! I do, my people do, it's our religion!
Redneck girl: So when you go to church, there's a cow there?
Hindu boy: No, we don't go to church.
Redneck girl: Have you ever gone cow-tipping?
Hindu boy: What's that?
Redneck girl: It's when you run up to a cow in the middle of the night and push it over and it goes “mooooooooo!” I tried to tip a horse once, too, but it just looked at me.
High School
North Carolina
Girl to friends: I thought I was playing hard to get, but it turns out I was playing “I hate you”.
Elon University
Elon, North Carolina
Punk: Why don’t they have a Father’s Day card that says, ‘Dad, you suck. Happy Father’s Day’?
Greensboro, North Carolina
Sophomore #1: [Whispering.]Sophomore #2: Oh, dude! She is hot!
Sophomore #1: [Inaudible.]Sophomore #2: I would so fuck her!
Sophomore #1: [Inaudible.]Sophomore #2: Dude, I so would fuck her. Like, fuck her up the ass.
Mt. Tabor High School
North Carolina
Overheard by: eating lunch.
School counselor, trying to get kids to guess a career: This person might work in fashion, or decorate houses…
Fourth grader: A gay guy!
Raleigh, North Carolina
Skinny boy at the back of the classroom: I had a Pop-Tart for breakfast!
Teacher, horrified: Why? Oh my god, why?!
Middle School
North Carolina
