Little boy: Today is the perfect day for a yellow balloon.
Restaurant
Vancouver
Canadia
Little boy: Today is the perfect day for a yellow balloon.
Restaurant
Vancouver
Canadia
Overweight mom with toddler: Then he found out he was a hermaphrodite, a boy cursed with the body of a woman. He grew up never knowing…never knowing a thing.
Overweight friend: Wouldn't ya know?
Seattle's Best Coffee
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: All You Can Eat
Teen girl #1: Okay, okay, look at that girl over there.
Teen girl #2: Which one?
Teen girl #1: The one with the short skirt, revealing halter top, and cowboy boots–what do you think of her?
Teen girl #2: I don't know what you're asking.
Teen girl #3: What do you think she does for a living?
Teen girl #2: I don't know, she could be an accountant.
Steak 'n Shake
Springfield, Missouri
Guy to friend: No, man, I mean…she's not a *whore* whore, just a whore.
Outside City Bistro
Hoboken, New Jersey
Overheard by: Chris Maimone
Lunching law firm girl #1: Oh god, when it comes to my track record… Seriously, I've dated two vampires and a guy who thought he was Jim Morrison reincarnated.
Lunching law firm girl #2: That's ridiculous. (pause) My junior year high school English teacher was Jim Morrison reincarnated. God!
Quizno's
Tucson, Arizona
Waitress: Can I get you something to drink?
Boyfriend: Uh yeah, a Sprite please.
Waitress: Is 7 Up okay?
Boyfriend: Uh…sure.
Waitress: And for you?
Girlfriend: Can I get a Sprite?
New Market
Canadia
Overheard by: meggler
