Washington

Guy on phone: What's wrong with taking a shower with the cat?

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Amy

Girl on cell: Yeah, he's a friend of my friend in California. He killed those two people… Oh, you saw him on the news? That's a shitty picture they have of him on tv, I hope they get a better picture soon.

University of Washington
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: trying to study here

40-something suit: Jesus Christ could not possibly make Seattle more depressing.

Bus
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Carefull listener

Man #1: So I got it, and then a month later my wife found out she's in menopause. So I got it for no reason.
Man #2: Damn.

Seattle, Washington

Girl with ponytail poof: He said I'm a stereotype, not an individual.
Blonde friends: That is so gay.

College, Tacoma

Overheard by: Kai

Sidewalk hoodlum to another: He had this bangin' ass bitch all up in his tent–and he doesn't even have a tent!

Olympia, Washington

Overheard by: Fzzzzzzzt

Woman visiting Seattle with daughters: Guess what daddy is doing down in Portland right now!
Four-year-old girl: Going to a bar?

Seattle, Washington

Girl #1: You're being awkward.
Girl #2: I'm not being awkward, I'm thinking something awkward.

Olympia, Washington

Prof: Is today Cinco de Mayo?
Girl: No, that's in a few days.
Prof: Well, I had a few shots of tequila when I got up this morning, just in case.

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Face