Washington

Loud 20-something girl on cell: What do you mean you made out with my uncle?!

Spokane, Washington

Older man: Let's go to that bikini coffee shop!
Younger woman: What? What?
Older man: It's a coffee shop where women with self esteem issues wear bikinis and serve… coffee. What's not to get?
Younger woman: Fuck you.

Seattle, Washington

Little girl, pointing to picture of Jesus on card: Who's that?
Babysitter: Well, that's Jesus.
Little girl: Oh… He looks like a nice guy.

Bellevue, Washington

College guy, watching little girl in husky cheerleader outfit: What's with all these cheerleaders everywhere? I like it!
Female friend: Dude, that sounded kind of wrong, she's like six.
College guy: Yeah… I just realized that.

UW Husky Tailgate
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Face

Middle-aged woman, about teenager: She's so beautiful. She could be a model. (pause) I want to run her over with my car.

Bellingham, Washington

Five-year-old girl: I farted on you, again.
Five-year-old brother: I don't care.

Shoreline, Washington

Mom passing rows of whole fish: When I was a little girl, I used to poke their raw eyeballs with my finger!
Little boy: Wow!

Pike Market
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: wow indeed

Anthropology professor teaching Sex and Gender: I'm afraid I'll have to leave class early today…I have to go to the hospital, I have a doctor's appointment…for something…at a certain time…

Western Washington University
Bellingham, Washington

Guy #1: Hahaha!
Guy #2: What? What’s so funny?
Guy #1: Didn’t you see that?
Guy #2: See what?
Guy #1: Turd covered with flies!
Both guys: Hahaha!

Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: highlarious

Middle-aged guy #1: So, Hulk Hogan’s daughter was what — 16 when that show started? Now she must be 19, and she’s dating a 30-year-old?
Middle-aged guy #2: If you’re old enough to drive when you’re 16 and you’re old enough to die for your country when you’re 18, then you’re old enough to make your own decisions.
Middle-aged guy #1: You know, half of those kids that died in World War II never got to experience life as we know it. They were all probably 17-year-old virgins from Iowa.
Middle-aged guy #2: Shit, if I had a kid, I’d take him to a whorehouse in Texas as soon as he turned thirteen.

18 bus
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Are you experience?