Girl to another: Woah, that was not me who peed all over that seat. I mean, did you see that girl stumble out? She couldn't even stand up! I mean… and we're the strippers?! Classy.
Camelot Strip Club
Washington, DC
Think Reproduction
Cashier: Whoa, those are interesting checks!
Old woman: Yeah, they usually get a reaction.
Cashier: Are those dancing skeletons?
Pat’s IGA
Calumet, Michigan
Granted, I Cut Her, but They Still Owe Me Ten Bucks
Gay guy: I told them not to have hip-hop night cause a bitch would get cut. And what happened? A bitch got cut!
Outside The Hippo
Mt. Vernon, Mayrland
God, You're So Competitive, Jason!
Ditzy woman: It would look more like Australia if it was an island, because Australia is an island… right?
Ditzy woman's daughter: I think that's the smartest thing that's ever been said in my presence.
Ditzy woman: Well, somebody in this family has to be brilliant.
Four-year-old boy: Dogs are kinda like vampires because they both have pointy teeth.
Harrisburg, Illinois
Not As Cute As a Baby with a Cigar, but Close.
Life insurance rep: So how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?
Young woman: Oh, maybe like three or four…
Life insurance rep: Oh, that's cute.
Jersey City, New Jersey
He’s Got the Extemporaneous Rhyming, but Can He Rope-a-Dope?
Voluble man: Hey, blondie! Hey! Guess what? I’m the prettiest man on this here bus! I’m like Muhammad Ali! Get your degree, smoke your crack free, national American methiversity! Hey, blondie! Guess what? I gots the prettiest dick on this whole bus! You should come over and check it on up!
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/03/that_commercial_was_on_when_i.html
Overheard by: blondie
I Don't Think You Have Much Choice
Woman on phone: So you want me to call her anyway and tell her that I'm not coming to a party that I wasn't invited to?
Park Ave
Long Beach, New York
Overheard by: Christina Federici
We've Found That First-Born Children Are Too Much Of a Hassle.
Conductor over PA: Forge Park, last stop. Please look around you and take all of your belongings. If you leave anything behind… We like tens and twenties.
Commuter Rail
Franklin, Massachusetts
We Just Post Your Photo in the Breakroom and Throw Tomatoes at It.
Fundraiser on phone: So what made it a cult? (pause) No, we don't record this information.
Reed College
Portland, Oregon
Boys Are As Disposable As Kleenex
Girl #1: Hey girl, what's up? How's your summer? You still runnin' 'round with that bad boy?
Girl #2: Oh no, he dead.
Girl #1: He dead?! No! He dead? When?
Girl #2: Few weeks ago. It don't matter. We weren't goin' out no more.
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