Overheard Everywhere

It Was All, “What Am I, a Fuck­ing Cow?”

Red­neck girl: So do you wor­ship cows?
Hin­du boy: Yes, that’s part of our re­li­gion.
Red­neck girl: No, I mean you. Do you wor­ship cows?
Hin­du boy: Yes! I do, my peo­ple do, it’s our re­li­gion!
Red­neck girl: So when you go to church, there’s a cow there?
Hin­du boy: No, we don’t go to church.
Red­neck girl: Have you ever gone cow-tip­ping?
Hin­du boy: What’s that?
Red­neck girl: It’s when you run up to a cow in the mid­dle of the night and push it over and it goes “mooooooooo!” I tried to tip a horse once, too, but it just looked at me.

High School
North Car­oli­na

Your Sex Slang Keeps Get­ting Flip­per and Flip­per

Girl with many shop­ping bags sit­ting down at pub ta­ble: Oh man… I’m knack­ered. I need gin.
Guy #1 at pub ta­ble: Busy day wax­ing the dol­phin?
Girl: What?
Guy #2 at pub ta­ble: Mate, I told you, wax­ing the dol­phin is what men do — with women its oil­ing the por­poise.

Leam­ing­ton Spa
Eng­land

Over­heard by: Bleep

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