On Today’s Episode Of Skanky and the Brain

Girl #1: Yeah, Dave*’s cute. Not super-attractive, but I’d sleep with him.
Girl #2: I wouldn’t.
Girl #1: Why not?
Girl #2: I made a pact with myself that I would never date him.
Girl #1: Yeah, but did you say you wouldn’t sleep with him?
Girl #2: No, I guess not.
Girl #1: So there’s, like, a loophole. You can sleep with him, just don’t date him.
Girl #2: Yeah, I guess so. Cool.
Girl #1: God, I’m so smart.

Valencia Community College
Orlando, Florida

Can I Get a Swig?

Hobo: Girl, I know you’re a freak! All redheads are freaks!
Brunette hipster pumping gas: Step off. What I do is none of your business.
Hobo: Lady, I’m just talking shit ’cause I’m drunk.
Brunette hipster: Me, too.

Kansas City, Missouri

Overheard by: cuspy

Obesity Is So Mainstream

20-something hipster girl to friend, as ringtone is heard: Haha, it's Adele!
Friend: Who?
20-something hipster girl: Oh, that fat girl everybody loves!

Boston, Massachusetts

One Day You Will Make Some Dork Very, Very Happy

20-something chick to friend on cell: I like how you're listening to the message I left you while I'm standing right here.
Friend: I just want to make sure I get the message, I don't want to be like one of those people who calls you back without listening to the message.
20-something chick: I hate those people! It's like, what if the message was really important? Like, “Help me, I'm dying! Don't call me back–it sets off the bomb!”

University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia

Overheard by: Good point