Loud woman #1: My friend is on that. When you fart, it makes you shit oil.
Loud woman #2: Really?
Loud woman #1: Yup, you shit oil and grease.
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/08/exxonmobil-is-now-in-pharmaceuticals.html
Overheard by: grossed out
HS boy #1: I love cheesecake in my mouth.
HS boy #2: You love dick in your mouth!!
HS boy #1: Well, yeah, if it has cheesecake on it!
Christiansburg, Virginia
Chick: Well, as I was writing this massive document I kept thinking about that thing about how you eat an elephant…
Dude: How?
Chick: One bite at a time.
Dude: Ahhh. You know how you bury a giraffe?
Chick: No, how?
Dude: You cut it up with a chainsaw.
Chick: [Silence.]Dude: I saw pictures from the zoo when they had to cut one up.
Chick: They took pictures?!
Dude: Yeah… I’m not sure why.
http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2007/03/overheard-short-play.html
Overheard by: mk
Bearded man, teaching math: …which is gonna give you nine over nine over four, which is horribly ugly. Does that terrify you greatly? It should.
UW Rock County
Janesville, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Akuaku
30-something guy: I can't speak English, but my prose is fuckin' smooth.
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: hb
Hippie chick: I am the proud owner of an American vagina, thank you very much.
Western Washington University
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Rachel
Guy: Dude, I think my roommate.
Leiden University
The Netherlands
Overheard by: Billy the Bootlegger
Little boy (chanting loudly): My penis and my butt! My penis and my butt! My penis and my butt, butt, butt, butt, butt!
Little girl: But I don't have a penis.
Both: My vagina and my butt! My vagina and my butt…
Ashland, Oregon
Overheard by: Kelly
Black lady on cell: I said, ‘Yeah, I’m black, but dat don’ mean I be makin’ counterfeit money!’
Food Lion
Sanford, North Carolina
Overheard by: Elizabeth
Tall Hispanic woman to one-legged Hispanic man in wheelchair: Nigga, I get with you, I have triplets–got that supersperm!
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: chuck