Girl in uniform: So when I went to pick up my uniform there were no skirts. So my mom was like “My daughter needs bottoms.”
Friend: That sucks!
Girl in uniform: Yeah, the skirt I’m wearing now belongs to this girl who was deported to Trinidad.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Myr
Though I Would Advise Against Googling the TA. *Shudder*
Professor: So I was looking through your online homework and I tried out the first question and I got it wrong. So I suggest you google the answer. You can find anything on google. Bellingham, Washington Overheard by: Condones This
I Blame Myself for Buying You the Little Pin-striped Suit and Supersoaker
Female: What are you gonna be for Halloween?
Child: Al Capone.
Female: But you're Al Capone every day.
Memphis, Tennessee
I'm Known As the Paul Revere of Gaudy Accessories
Lesbian with terrible tie: I am the vanguard of the revolution.
Cozy Corner Diner & Pancake House
Chicago, Illinois
Um, It's a Shit Party in Your Pants, Dude
Girl at party: For the last time: I am not interested in you. You're too short, too fat and too drunk!
Guy, defiantly: I'm not drunk! If I was drunk, I wouldn't think you were so fucking ugly!
(girl storms off angrily)
Guy, to himself: It's a shit party when the ugliest bitch at the party ain't a sure thing!!
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Scotty
Was Alvin and the Chipmunks Banned in Canadia?
Lady #1: So we have these squirrels in our backyard, and I don't know if the rabbits got to them or what, but they don't have any tails, just these stubs.
Lady #2: (laughs loudly)
Union Station
Toronto
Canadia
That's Why Raccoons Wash Their Food First
Guy: When I went down on him, I realized he didn't shower.
Friend: Gross.
Guy: Yeah, I wasn't even gagging because of his dick, but because of his foul stench.
UC
Berkeley, California
Then My Crush Only Increased.
Ten-year old girl #1: He was pretty cute.
Ten-year old girl #2: I know! I had the biggest crush on him in third grade… until he died.
Santa Fe, New Mexico
Overheard by: Wait. What?
…Your Majesty
Guy to friend: Well, you're from England and she's Canadian, so it probably has something to do with the metric system. Lexington, Kentucky
Instant Coffee: Explained
Philosophy teacher: So, I've created a robot that knows how to go into my office and make me a coffee. But what if something goes wrong? What if the coffee's in a different place, or there's no milk? What if there's bees in the sugar?
Perth
Australia