Professor: Today we’re going to be synthesizing a 6,6 nylon molecule. Who can tell me where the sixes come from?
Student: The devil!
Professor: Very good. Note the dreaded mark of the polymer beast.
Chemistry lab, Concord University
Athens, West Virginia
Overheard by: I’m also failing chemistry
Dude #1: Let’s go somewhere else.
Dude #2: Why?
Dude #1: I’ve seen the midget. I’ve drunk his juice.
Dude #2: Yeah…
Casey’s, South Side
Chick #1: Have you ever had a class with him?
Chick #2: Yeah.
Chick #1: Does he really cry in class?
Chick #2: Sometimes.
Chick #1: … Cool.
Overheard by: wishing he was my prof
Woman #1, to table of friends: Well, I’m getting old, too. I’m getting wrinkles.
Woman #2: The thing is, you’re so fucking ugly that no one notices when you get old.
Overheard by: Me.
Woman pointing at cadaver: Oooh. I’d love one of those for home!
Young suit: I need to get a new BlackBerry. I dropped my old one in a urinal. Well, I was wearing lederhosen, and they don’t have pockets.
San Jose Airport
Overheard by: Keren
Mom to screaming toddlers: No! You are the noisiest humans I’ve ever seen!
Old hag: Sometimes I forget I’m married. I guess if my husband was rich I wouldn’t forget about him, but he not.
Overheard by: anonymous
Teen girl: I just discovered my fly was undone when my hand was mysteriously near my crotch.