Possibly preggers teen: I’m going to name my baby ‘Vodka.’
Skanky mom: Oh.
Liquor store
Delaware
Little girl, singing: Hey! I’m a crazy bitch, but I fuck so good you’re on top of it when you dream of doing me all night…
Father: What the fuck?! Are you trying to get taken by the social worker?!
Food Court, Connecticut Post Mall
Milford, Connecticut
- Posted on May 5, 2024
- Connecticut, Dads, Music, Should have used a condom
Sleazy white employee: Yeah, man, black girls know how to work it.
Black employee: Uh-huh.
Sleazy white employee, whispering: Yo, man, I was doin’ one one time, though, and I was about to go on her chest and she was like, ‘Nuh-uh,’ and pointed it at me and it went on my chest!
EB Games
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: works downstairs
- Posted on May 3, 2024
- Coworkers, Gossip, Pennsylvania
Chick #1: So, what was it like? Would you do it again?
Chick #2: Kind of like a hot dog… I was so hungry…
Chick #1: Ewww!
Chick #1: I just wanted to bite down, y’know?
http://community.livejournal.com/overheardatyork/30067.html
- Posted on May 3, 2024
- BJs, Chicks, Overheard at York
Fourth grade student: All the guys in France have big schlongs.
Virginia
Midwestern tourist: Excuse me, are there any malls around here?
Local teen, in exaggerated accent: We don’t have malls in these here parts. Malls tempt the young ones to siiin. [Tourist leaves, scared. Teen then grumbles without accent] Fucking tourist.
Broadway and 4th Avenue
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: pedestrian
Dude exiting cab: Oh! Hi!
Girl on sidewalk, trying to hail cab: Hi.
Dude exiting cab: You’re hot! Wanna make out?
Girl on sidewalk: Not right now.
Dude exiting cab: Slut!
Huntington Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
- Posted on May 1, 2024
- Insults, Jerks, Massachusetts
Preppy girl: Can we have our cell phones on for the field trip?
Teacher: No.
Preppy girl: But what if we get separated from the group? How will we find our way back?
Female peer: Ask a friendly hobo.
Hume-Fogg High School
Nashville, Tennessee
Girlfriend: Oooh! Baby, we should get a dozen donuts!
Boyfriend: Okay. Do you wanna pick six, and I’ll pick six? [Girlfriend gives icy stare.] Fine, you pick all twelve. I don’t care.
Girlfriend: Twelve? I said I want a dozen.
Boyfriend: Um, honey, twelve is a dozen.
Girlfriend: I know what a dozen is, and it’s not fucking twelve! I’m not fucking stupid, you know!
Boyfriend: You’re, like 25 years old! How can you not know what a dozen is?
Girlfriend: I know what a fucking dozen is! [Looks around] What the fuck are all of you laughing at?!
King Soopers Dairy
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: We were right to point and laugh
Marine: So, things were going really well until he blew the tranny.
Twentynine Palms, California
- Posted on April 12, 2024
- BJs, California, Gossip, Military