Little girl: Can I have the nose now?
Guy: Yeah, sure, it probably has everyone's snot on it now, though.
Older girl: Ew! Oh my gosh, mental image!
Guy: What do you want me to say? I'm speaking their language.
Older girl: Say “nose… products.” It has “nose products.”
Guy, laughing hysterically: Nose products?
Older girl: Yes, nose products.
Little girl, holding out fake vampire teeth: Here, take my mouth products.
Kids' Playground
Manhattan, New York
Furious hobo in tie-dye to frightened college student: You know why girls wear perfume and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink! God bless you.
Berkeley, California
Guy #1: These glasses hurt my eyes.
Guy #2: But there aren't even any lenses in them!
St. Peter's College
New Jersey
Physical therapy student: So he's gotten a *lot* more fit in the last 300 years, right?
Simmons College
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Yoshi
Loud black guy at pharmacy counter to friend: You know why they got that, right? (points to sign about restrictions on liquid cough medicine sales) Cos people are using them to make methamphetamine. Mm-hmm, if you mix that up you can make methamphetamine. (looks around, whispers to friend, they laugh) You don't see any brothers doing that shit, that's all I'm saying.
CVS
New Rochelle, New York
Female student: Uh… I think we left off on the hymen.
Sex ed teacher: Oh, we're going there.
Janesville, Wisconsin
Bro: We don't put shaving cream on our dicks, we put it on our faces.
Illinois State University
Overheard by: Eddy
Tiny black girl: And then I had to have Buckley's, and you know what? It tastes exactly like jizz.
Asian girl, perplexed: You've had Buckley's?
Pub
Toronto
Canadia
Screaming woman, surrounded by children: I haven't breast fed in months! Why won't they leave me alone?!
Philadelphia Zoo
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: mammophile
Incredibly drunk sorority girl to boyfriend: Sweetie, can we throw up before we do it tonight?
UBC
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: The only sober guy on the bus
