20-something #1: Yeah, see, that’s our problem: These girls are pushing 30 and their biological clocks are going off and all that.
20-something #2: Well, that wasn’t my problem before, she was 23 when I started dating her.
20-something #1 (thoughtfully): Yeah… that’s our other problem: time.
Airplane between Detroit and Las Vegas
Overheard by: ncs
American backpacker girl, about her new hostel boyfriend: So, as of this afternoon, he’s one step closer to not being a virgin.
Dutch girl, shocked: What about your period?!
American friend, walking up: Don’t worry. Just do it. He won’t even know what’s going on anyways.
Loki Hostel
La Paz
Bolivia
Female suit: Wow, it smells really bad in here… like old period. Yeah! That’s it, old period.
Bridie O’Reillys
Melbourne
Australia
Hipster guy: Yeah, it probably didn’t help that I gave you poison ivy and then threw up on you.
Bar
Columbia, Missouri
Angry suit on cell: I cleaned out my ass for you, bitch!
On the Street
San Francisco, California
Woman in cereal aisle: Where’s the one that makes you poop?
Fry’s
Tucson, Arizona
New homeowner: Did you ever find out what was causing that smell?
Worker: Yep.
New homeowner: What was it?
Worker: I’m not gonna tell ya.
New homeowner: Come on, what was it?
Worker, with a serious face and tone: You’ve got about four and a half to five opossums underneath your house.
Huntington, West Virginia
Overheard by: Jess
Teen girl: Sam is so sexy. There’s like, no poopy on him.
Palm City, Florida
Overheard by: I don’t know about you
Freshman girl: Never snort salt.
Other freshman girl: I know, right! It burns so bad!
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: Shelby
Girl #1: Nobody ever sits on it and I don’t blame them.
Girl #2: You call it the sex couch, that’s why.
Girl #1: I Febreze it!
Girl #2: And then you say that!
Brighton, Massachusetts
