Little boy picking up women’s underwear: Mommy, what is this?
Mother: That’s women’s underwear.
Little boy: I’m touching women’s underwear?! I’m touching women’s underwear!
Mother: Stay away from that, Tommy*.

Novi, Michigan

Roommate #1: Do you want to go clothes shopping for spring break?
Roommate #2, making disgusted face: I don't wear clothes on spring break.
Roommate #1: (long pause)
Roommate #2: I just wear a bathing suit.

University of Michigan, Ann Arbor

Overheard by: Roommate #3

Professor: Do we know if marijuana has any long-term effects?
Male student: Ball cancer.

Western Michigan University

Overheard by: H

Student #1: Did you end up taking her to SeaWorld or Busch Gardens or something?
Student #2: Naw, man, I told you — she set all my clothes on fire!
Student #1: See, I think that’s kinky.

Michigan State University

Teen boy to friend: I guess what I’m trying to say is… I really want to be your sidekick.

NCG Cinemas
Lansing, Michigan

Ghetto chick: It’s 10 minutes to midnight — I’m ’bout to turn into a bitch.

Magic Stick
Detroit, Michigan

Overheard by: Swells

Teen on cell: If you can flip it, you deserve to flip it. If it's flippable, I'm flippin' it.

Grand River Avenue

Brunette: I don't think dinosaurs were ever real.
Blonde: Why is that?
Brunette: If they were really that big, only like ten could fit on earth. They wouldn't even be able to walk around much.
Blonde: Oh, you're probably right. I've never thought about it like that before.

Northern Michigan University

Chick: The peeing politician doesn't float my boat.


Overheard by: Meister E

Woman on phone: Okay, so go past the monkey and we'll be right here!

Harrison, Michigan