Sorority girl: Well, she should stop having abortions then!

University of Michigan

Boarding attendant at gate: At this time, you may put away your photo IDs… Unless, of course, you are exceptionally attractive. In that case, my name is Jason, I’m a Virgo, and I enjoy long walks on the beach.

Detroit Metro Airport

Overheard by: orange

Chick: It wasn’t, like, black people-scary. It was, like, Appalachian-scary. I didn’t feel like I was going to be shot, I felt like I was going to be eaten.

University of Michigan
Ann Arbor, Michigan

Five-year-old boy: I feel gay!
Dad: What?
Five-year-old boy: I feel gay!
Dad: No, you don’t.

Grand Blanc, Michigan

Frazzled mother: At Michigan State they don't even have parties. They're not going to want you at a party. You are not going to a party. There is no chance.
Hopeful twelve-year-old boy: Oh, there's a chance.

East Lansing, Michigan

Overheard by: Cameron

Male student: So there was a hobo on the train and he sat next to me and he was like, “me no wah”. So I was like, “what?” and he just said “me no wah!” so I was really confused and then I realized I had my backpack, so I gave him a pen and a paper and he wrote “m-e n-o w-a-h.” So I was really mad and was like, “dude, that was supposed to clear things up,” but it didn't.
Female student: Word.

University of Michigan, Ann Arbor

Overheard by: Kelli

Mother holding small child as she sees a girlfriend: Sammi* look! It’s Debbie! Say hi to Debbie!
Small child: Hi, ugly man!

Traverse City, Michigan

Middle aged man: Hey, Jesse! Wanna wrestle?
Shirtless young man: I'll wrestle you if you give me a Jägerbomb!
Middle aged man: You better hurry, we're running out!

Traverse City, Michigan

Male student: We were learning about harmanfadites in my psych class today.
Female student: What's that?
Male student It's when a person is born with boy and girl parts.
Female student: Nasty.
Male student: Yeah. I was wondering, if two of them have sex, are they both gay? Or lesbians?
Female student: I can't talk about this while I am eating.

Wayne State University
Detroit, Michigan

Overheard by: Jonson

Ditz to friend: He took me Facebook poking him as a romantic gesture!

TC Central High School